


Over Sugarless Aconite

by Glacier_Llane



Series: A Palate for Strange Remedies [3]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Book 3: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, F/M, Fluff, Healers, Pining, Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive, Slow Build, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-07-06
Packaged: 2020-03-07 19:27:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 33,795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18879709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glacier_Llane/pseuds/Glacier_Llane
Summary: Called back to Hogwarts to tend to a professor with Lycanthropy, you dreaded what animosity may arise due to your family ties to an escaped convict. Surprisingly, you find solace in late night conversations over brewing Wolfsbane Potion.





	1. Admission

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to part 2! 
> 
> Thank you all so much for all the wonderful comments on Bitter Like Medicine, honestly, it greatly motivates me to write. 
> 
> I am still kind of sick, but I REALLY want to post this so... 
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> As usual, (f/n) is your first name.  
> And you're still a Black.

“Professor Dumbledore, I assure you, I do not need a personal healer—“

“Sorry I’m late, headmaster, an errand kept me,” You weren’t the slightest bit regretful that you interrupted the escalating conversation. Holding your head high, you stepped out of the fireplace and mustered a polite smile to the headmaster. In front of him was a man in tattered clothing, standing and gripping the desk. He turned to you with a mildly irritated look. 

“ _Lupin_ ,” You nodded in greeting, your tone not the slightest bit friendly. 

“… _Black_ ,” He nodded just as coldly. Must be odd for him to call you by your family name… especially in the current circumstances. 

“With all due respect, sir,” You addressed Dumbledore, “Perhaps you should have provided me with more details before I arrived here.”

Dumbledore stood up from his chair and smiled. 

“Then I applaud your interest for getting you here either way,” He made his way around the desk. You clenched your teeth. Well, this man _was_ the greatest wizard of his time… “As you know, our friend Lupin here is afflicted with—“ 

“Sir, she doesn’t—“

“Lycanthropy.” You finished for them. Lupin stared at you in shock. “Forgive me, the discovery was most certainly accidental.” Your tone was even and business-like, “But that’s not the point. What exactly do you need me for, headmaster?”

“First of all, I apologise if I’ve offended you, Lupin. (f/n) will only assist you if you so require, but other than that I’m sure she will stay away from your personal business.” Dumbledore looked at you pointedly. 

What? It’s not like you have any interest in meddling with Lupin’s personal life. 

This bit information seemed to at least calm lupin down.

“And (f/n), I believe Severus requires assistance in making the Wolfsbane Potion. He has successfully made the first batch, but the process could be greatly sped up if he has a helping hand. I’m sure he would be pleased to teach you,” The headmaster had a suspicious twinkle about his eye. “She will also be the one to escort you to the shack instead of Madam Pomfrey, I’m sure you understand that the Madam is getting weary with age, as she so puts it,” He chuckled and turned to you, “She will see you tomorrow to provide the necessary equipment for a first-aid kit.” 

He let the silence capture the room and took it as a sign of agreement from the two of you. 

“You are welcome to my office if any of you have anything further to discuss. In the meantime, I suggest you get acquainted with one another,” With a smile and a twinkle in his eyes, he left the office.

You turned to Lupin silently.

Agreeing to come to Hogwarts seemed to get you acquainted with people your family wouldn’t approve of. 

There was nothing more you needed to know.

“Good night, Lupin,” You sidestepped him and went to the door. 

_“How?”_

You stopped by the open door and looked over your shoulder. 

“How did you discover it?”

“One morning, I was helping Madam Pomfrey in the hospital wing and I saw her mix powdered silver into your wounds. I didn’t think it more than odd at the time until I learnt what it meant years later.” You walked out of the room without a second glance.

.

.

.

You stepped onto the circular staircase as it descended.

At times, you wonder why you constantly put your inheritance on the line in exchange for knowledge. You supposed you were never satisfied that way. You realised that Dumbledore requesting it be kept secret was not just for privacy. 

Your parents would send a howler if they discovered you were in contact with a werewolf. 

No matter, this school year would certainly be interesting. 

What did Dumbledore even say to the head healer to let you discreetly leave? Well, it’s not like they would notice you missing, ever since your promotion— 

"I take it you're resigning?" 

You clutched your chest and turned towards the voice with your wand drawn. 

"Merlin's beard, Severus! You startled me!" You hissed. Even in the faint moonlight, you could see his satisfied smirk. Well, this was not how you imagined your reunion at all. "Why on earth are you standing there in the dark like a Dementor?" 

Which were, to your credit, currently roaming the grounds. 

"Dumbledore told me to escort you to your quarters," He stepped out of the corner and you could see his smirk even clearer now. What a smug bastard. You exhaled and lowered your wand, trying to calm your spiked heartbeat. 

You've spent the last week of summer formulating what to say to him once you meet, and he goes about greeting you by scaring you half to death. 

You supposed it indicated that the game of pestering was still on. 

You nodded and started walking towards the dungeons. Severus kept your pace and walked beside you. 

"Well?" 

"Well what, Severus?" 

"Will you be resigning?" His tone had a strange edge that you couldn't quite place.

"Why do you think so?" You glanced over to him and saw his hands clasped in front of him. He was fidgeting like when he saw you off that last day. 

"As I understand, Dumbledore invited you here under... somewhat vague explanations. I didn't think you would... accept." 

"Those vague explanations were apparently enough to pique my curiosity," _and I (desperately) wanted to see you_ — you drew in a breath to avoid shaking your head, "and at this point, I'll do anything to get away from my current job situation." 

"Really? I suppose the promotion has been _awful_ , then,” He said. There goes the sarcasm. 

“I was promoted to a desk job, Severus. All summer the only thing I've been doing is menial paperwork. Perhaps the occasional patient required my help, but other than that..." You realised you were ranting and sighed, "and _you,_ " you pointed at him as you stopped in the dungeon corridor. He paused, raised his eyebrow and tilted his head. 

_Merlin, he's even more adorable than you remembered._

“I recall you saying that you would write," You said almost threateningly. 

"I... didn't think my personal life relevant to your interests," He looked away and shifted his weight. 

On the contrary, it didn't matter if he had written about dull things in his life, you just wanted to... _hear from him._

_You missed him._

You inwardly groaned. You seem to have developed a habit of admitting things to yourself whenever you're around him. Well, at least you weren’t admitting them out loud. 

The awkwardness stretched on until he unclasped his hands and sidestepped you to walk to his door. "If you're not resigning,” He seemed almost hopeful… perhaps you were imagining things, “then I suggest we start on the potion tomorrow." 

Odd, that was a straightforward invitation from him. When Dumbledore told you you'd be working with Severus, you assumed that it was the headmaster's idea and that Severus would be reluctant to accept your help— being as he was. 

He stood by his open doorway and the light from his office illuminated his silhouette. You could clearly see his tired eyes. The term hasn't even started… and he's already tired. 

"What time?" You asked. 

"Preferably after dinner,” He looked into your eyes and to your surprise, you didn’t feel that tug in your mind he so frequently caused. 

You took in the face you haven’t seen all summer. Somewhere between the dull paperwork, you questioned yourself if your memory had been failing you, or was Severus really as… _attractive_ as your mind made him out to be. Standing there in front of him, you supposed… he was. 

Another thing you’ve just admitted to yourself. _Damn._

It made you dread (but at the same time anticipate) working with him. 

"Very well," You nodded, "Good night, Severus.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes, i'm sick and I updated 3 chapters in one go jusT CAUSE I FEEL LIKE IT. 
> 
> Love y'all.


	2. Professor Snape

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh hey, early update, yeah!!! It's 12 AM Friday in my time so...
> 
> Good news is, I'm not sick anymore, the bad news is that I have a test in the morning and tomorrow so wish me luck,,, being an engineering student is hard and I'm not even into the core subjects yet, f-
> 
> Thank you to Lunna and MicreantBrat for leaving comments on the last chapter, as well as everyone who has left kudos! I'm glad that you all love this story and it greatly motivates me to write.
> 
> Sometimes I get so motivated I desire to finish everything in one night, which, besides being unhealthy, is a near impossible feat to do. ~~Funfact, I have already written the first draft of the ULTIMATE ending which would be like ~50 chapters away...~~
> 
> Also after reevaluating the plotline of this part, it seems that it would be 15 chapters instead of 10... I am trying to make it slow... despite my impatience. 
> 
> Enough of my ranting, enjoy!

Madam Pomfrey arrived in the afternoon, somewhat profusely apologising for putting the responsibility of handling a werewolf to you. You looked up from the stack of paperwork that you had packed with you and assured her it was no issue. 

The first-aid bag she brought contained usual things; a bottle of blood replenishing potion, a vial of Dittany, and a bottle of calming draught. She instructed to ask Severus for the powdered silver to mix with the Dittany.

Not a problem, since you’d be seeing him later tonight. 

You had your meals in your quarters. As much as you wanted to see how Granger, Potter, and Weasley were doing, you knew no one would appreciate a Black running around the halls in recent news. It would also be wise to stay away due to his ties to the boy. 

You weren’t even sure if they would trust you now… 

Besides, you certainly did not want Draco to discover that you were here. 

.

.

.

Dinner dully passed and you found yourself looking forward to the night’s task. You insisted that you were interested in the potion and not… _Severus_. Though seeing him would certainly be a bonus— you chastised yourself but wondered what exactly it is that you found so attractive about him… 

You knocked on his door to pull yourself from your continually wandering thoughts.

There was no answer. 

Huh, perhaps he wasn’t present? You knocked again and still received no answer. You were sure it was well over dinner…

Footsteps and a shuffle of robes came from the hallway and you didn’t have to look up to know that it was Severus.

“Apologies, your nephew has so graciously been attacked by a hippogriff during Care of Magical Creatures today," He nonchalantly dropped the information, “and as head of house I had to asses the situation.”

You were more surprised that Draco listened to you and took Care of Magical Creatures than him being attacked (he had never been good with animals). Well, you now hoped he wouldn't blame you for his ailment.

"Draco? Is he alright?” You asked while Severus unlocked his door. 

“He will be, though I'm sure Lucius will have a go at Hagrid because of this," _Hagrid teaches Care of Magical Creatures now?_ You supposed the man had always had an affinity for beasts… “The boy went on about how his life was in danger despite Madam Pomfrey saying he’s fine…” You wonder where Severus is dragging this— “I suppose he's got the flair for the dramatics from the Black side of his family." He looked at you with a pointed stare. 

Well, the man just went through lengthy small talk to pester you. It was endearing and insulting at the same time. 

You scoffed, which you later realised proved his point. He had a smug smirk as he let you in his office. 

You noticed you’ve seen that complacent smile twice now, and you just got here _yesterday night_. Perhaps your strange feelings have let your guard down, enabling him to have the upper hand. You really needed to improve your pestering strategies… 

He led you through his office and handed you a bundle of parchment laden with printed instructions.

“Read while I prepare everything,” He commanded dryly and went to his shelves.

You looked down at the parchment in your hands. Judging from the number of sheets alone, you could tell it was a complicated potion.

You’ve heard of the Wolfsbane Potion before, but the specific instructions were never published, due to the dangers of the Aconite itself. You wonder how Severus got a hold of it… Perhaps Dumbledore had connections with Damocles Belby himself. 

You scanned the ingredients list and already found three poisonous ingredients, including the Aconite. 

“Recite the dangers of Aconite,” Severus placed the last jar on the worktable and sat by his desk in front of you. He was testing you as if you were one of his students. 

_Alright, you could play this game._

“Aconite, also known as Monkshood or Wolfsbane, is a flowering plant with highly poisonous leaves and roots,” you said, “improperly soaking and boiling it during potion-making will make it retain its toxicity thus turning the potion into aconite poison.” 

Severus nodded in approval and joined his hands on the desk, “Moving down the list, describe the use of Alihotsy leaves.” 

So, this is what he’s like in the classroom. You wished you could roam the castle once just to see him teach a class, performing in his element. _What a sight it would be—_

“Finely chopped Alihotsy leaves are used as an ingredient for the Laughing Potion. The leaves' mirth-inducing properties can be damaged by stirring the potion too vigorously following its addition to the mixture,” You explained confidently, “Anything else, _Professor Snape_?” You batted your eyes and smirked teasingly. 

His reaction was immediate and not so subtle; he scowled, a blush tinting his cheeks, and loudly cleared his throat as he stood up. 

“Finish the rest of the pages and we’ll start with the Aconite.” He avoided your gaze as he walked back to the worktable. 

_How adorable_ … You decided the flush on his face was something you could really get used to. It brought a little bit of colour to his otherwise monochrome appearance. 

You knew that you were good at flustering him. The charms of a Black were definitely hard to beat. 

Looking up from the papers, you saw him scowling, still and he appeared to be muttering to himself as he set up knives and scalpels, a hint of pink still visible on his usually pale cheeks. 

You weren’t just good at it… you were _excellent_. 

You hid your wide grin behind the instruction papers. 

.

.

.

Severus had avoided testing you further on your knowledge and opted to trust your training in favour of steering clear of your tease, _to your disappointment._ (You supposed it was so you’d get the job done sooner)

You both handled the Aconite according to the instructions and finished just before midnight. 

You were clearing the worktable when a compass-looking object caught your eye. 

“What’s this?” You lifted it up and inspected it. 

“A lunar chronograph Dumbledore insisted I borrow. If you read the third stage you’ll know the potion needs to be bathed in moonlight to ferment,” He grabbed the object and your fingers brushed, stirring up the feeling in your gut, “that, and the fact that the potion will be consumed a goblet full every day before the full moon… _obligates_ us to brew it every month.” He couldn’t hide the bitterness in his voice. 

The feeling stirring inside you suddenly desired to try and swallow his bitterness. You clenched your teeth and desperately tried to subdue it. 

How would you even do it? The man was the epitome of sullenness. It would be like trying to get blood off of your healer apron— magical-based lacerations does something to the blood that among other things, makes it really hard to clean. 

And what would you gain from it? You were never one to please others… 

Yet despite trying to rationalise it, the desire to see Severus less bitter persisted. 

He flicked open the lens on the lunar chronograph and inspected his window. It was impossible to see through the black lake. 

“I shall need to go to the Astronomy Tower to set it,” 

You blinked.

“Shall I accompany you?” You asked, feigning nonchalance, “I’m in need of fresh air after spending the day holed up in the dungeons.” Your gaze flickered away for a moment as you wondered why you had the need to make excuses. 

He narrowed his eyes at you and you expected a tug on your thoughts, but he inclined his head to the door instead. 

.

.

.

Severus apparently opted not to use a light, to avoid disturbing the portraits. Which would be fine if you could see in the dark like him… (Severus didn’t just resemble a bat in looks, it seemed) 

You tried following the sound of his steps as best you could, but your foot caught on his cape and— 

He growled, frustratedly grabbed your arm to prevent you from falling, and dragged you along the rest of the way. 

You desperately hoped he couldn’t see your blush in the dark. 

He warned you of the steps to the winding staircase of the tower and released your arm as light started to stream from the top. You released your breath and tried to calm your errant heartbeat. 

.

.

He quietly perched himself on the balcony and searched for the moon while holding up the chronograph. 

It gave you ample time to inspect him as he was busy adjusting the many facets of the object. 

Soft moonlight highlighted his face and brought out his fine features.

You notice his cheekbones gave his profile a particularly beautiful edge, despite his cheeks being quite hollow, his eyes were hauntingly darker in contrast to his illuminated face, and his hair seemed to frame his face just the right way tonight… his hooked nose was also a handsome addition to complete his face.

Severus was attractive in his own right, despite his… _“efforts”_ to clean himself up. 

You wanted to laugh. He was definitely not by your parents’ standards for a suitor. 

A half-blood, certainly not financially prosperous, and not particularly well-kept either. It made you further question why you were fond of him…

Well, it’s not like you wanted to get anywhere with him… right? 

The briefest glance to his lips — which were pursed in concentration, made you want to—

 

_Your eyes widened and you gripped the bars of the balcony._

No, no, no, no, no. 

 

Severus finished adjusting the watch and turned to you with a confused stare. 

“I was surprised by the height is all,” You lied through your teeth and stepped away from the balcony. He didn’t seem to be convinced but had no interest to investigate. 

“It looks like the full moon will be in nine days, so you’ll start giving him the potion the day after tomorrow,” He turned towards the stairs and started descending. 

Apparently, the chance of catching fresh air rendered you out of breath instead. 

You ran a hand over your face before following him into the dark halls once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The recipe for Wolfsbane Potion does not exist, so I made one up myself. 
> 
> It's a combination of key ingredients from:  
> Memory Potion | Wit-sharpening Potion | Invigoration Draught | Draught of Peace
> 
> You'll see more of it in later chapters.


	3. Alihotsy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I'm finally on a two-week break, so I can write to my heart's content. That is why if you've seen my post on my tumblr ([palatefor-strangeremedies](https://palatefor-strangeremedies.tumblr.com/)), I announced that I will be posting Fridays and Mondays during these weeks. Perhaps even during exam week, because I usually make more content instead of studying— AHEM. 
> 
> Thank you to MiscreantBrat, honestlyrachel, cloudywishes, Chibiace04, lizardwizard707, LightOwl1505, alex, Kitanni, and EliDeetz for leaving comments on the last chapter, as well as everyone who left comments on the previous instalments in this series. I swear I notice every one of you, and I want to reply but most of the time idk what to say except I LOVE YOU ALL HOLY SHIT. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who has left kudos! (I can't believe this has reached 50 kudos already I am in tears)
> 
> Enjoy the chapter, I have to go lie down to process all this love— //sobs in happiness

The next day, you continued your boring paperwork in the afternoon and re-read the instructions Severus left with you.

When you worked with him again that night, you tried to avoid looking at his face for too long, lest the _thoughts_ appear again. However, you found that staring at his hands wasn’t particularly helpful either.

Severus was no doubt skilled in his work, and it showed in the movement of his hands. His fingers glided across the Wolfsbane petals as if in a caress and it made you wonder what it would feel like to hold—

You hissed and looked back down to your work. Severus swiftly turned his head towards you and gave you an odd look. 

“It wouldn’t do if you poisoned yourself,” He said.

“I’m sure people would assume you murdered me,” You chuckled. He only gave a twitch of a smirk and went back to inspecting your hands… “I haven’t pricked myself, Severus.” 

He nodded and turned back to his own task. 

_Was he… worried just now?_

You blinked and felt your lips pull up into a smile. 

_Curse these strange feelings… for making you grin like a fool._

Yet the warmth in your chest didn’t feel entirely unwelcome. 

* * *

"I think it would be prudent of you to use the door instead," Lupin said as you stepped out of his office’s fireplace.

"Forgive me, Dumbledore does not wish me to roam the halls. I'm sure you understand," You placed the goblet full of Wolfsbane Potion on his desk. He blankly stared at he faint blue smoke emanating from it. It was far from a good-looking potion. The liquid itself was murky and altogether not appetising.

Lupin looked up and motioned to the fireplace. 

"I'm not leaving until you finish it," You firmly stated. 

He flared his nostrils and reluctantly took the goblet. You saw him test its smell and slowly took the first sip. He choked on the potion and spat on his desk. 

“ _That's horrid!_ ” He hissed, and you gave him a seething look. 

“Nothing I can do anything about that, unfortunately," You said in a tone that bordered on menacing, "now refrain from spitting it out, as you would need to drink a goblet full every day of the week before the full moon... and I _trust_ you know that it's not a simple potion to make." 

Your anger was rising fast. Lupin had the audacity to spit out a potion which _Merlin knows how long_ Severus took to make. Even with your help these last two nights, you haven't been through the first stage of brewing it…

Taste shouldn’t be his main concern—

You drew in a deep breath and closed your eyes. This was no attitude to have with a patient. 

Looking at it objectively, you had nothing against Lupin… The extent of your knowledge of him was when he was a student. You knew he wasn’t a very good student during his time at Hogwarts, letting Potter and… Sirius… 

You realise that it was your predisposition to Severus that made you resent the man. Spending so much time with him _has_ made his bitterness rub off on you.

Opening your eyes, you observed Lupin carefully.

Besides his patched robes, you could see faint scars on his face, which were no doubt due to his condition. His eyes were stern as he stared at you, but you could detect a flicker of fear in them. 

(You couldn’t blame him. He was face-to-face with a Black. You could easily spread the information of his ailment to your family and the whole wizarding world would know…)

In front of you was a man agonised by his Lycanthropy, not an irresponsible teenager.

"Please understand, it is to your best interests that the potion works as effectively as it could," You said in a much calmer tone.

Lupin cautiously regarded your change of intonation. You gestured towards the goblet. 

It was decided; you will treat Lupin as if he was any other patient, nothing more, nothing less. 

He seemed to be suspicious of you still, but gave in with a sigh and braced himself as he gulped down the liquid. You had your hand on the hilt of your wand as he gagged a few more times, but he kept it in with a fist clenched in front of his tightly closed lips. 

You wonder if there _is_ anything you could do about the taste. 

"Would you like me to find something to it wash down?" You took the goblet and checked if it was sufficiently emptied. Lupin sat back in his chair when the heaving stopped and you flicked your wand to clean up the spill on his desk. 

"I think I can find something myself, thank you.” He said dismissively.

"Good day, then, Professor Lupin," You said and disappeared into the flames. 

* * *

The potion was progressing steadily. All of the Aconite has been sufficiently dealt with for the time being, so it was time to move to the Alihotsy and Moonseeds.

Severus didn’t leave room to argue when he insisted you handled the Alihotsy while he took care of the Moonseeds. (Not that you were complaining, you love Alihotsy leaves.)

You’ve never seen anyone treat Alihotsy so very cautiously… 

Severus seemed to plainly dread touching it and cast a wordless _Wingardium Leviosa_ to place the jar in front of you, on the farthest end of the worktable. Alihotsy wasn’t even poisonous… _unless—_

You stifled your laughter behind your hand.

“Have you accidentally ingested it already?” He narrowed his eyes to the jar, “I don’t see the mirth in all of this—”

“Of course you don’t, Severus,” You said through your laughter, “ _you’re allergic to it._ ” 

He snarled at you.

“Apologies,” You calmed your giggling, “I didn’t mean to pry, but as a healer it’s too easy to pick up on these things.” 

_Merlin, what a discovery!_ The bitter man was actually _allergic to happiness_ … You couldn’t wipe the grin off your face. (Well, it was a laughter-inducing plant, but still… _the fitting parallel of it all.)_

“Remind me not to feed you Alihotsy-flavoured food,” You said without much thought. He furrowed his eyebrows at you, trying to decipher what you meant by that. 

It was as if you might be planning on inviting him for—

You both simultaneously realised what you just implied and looked down onto your respective workspace. 

_Merlin’s beard._

Nevermind your parents finding out, what would you do if _Severus_ found out? 

Heaven knows what his reaction would be…

You glimpsed at him and saw he was grumbling to himself. You didn’t catch anything he said save for a brief mutter of your name. 

_Perhaps it wouldn’t be so terrible…?_

Another glance and you met his eyes as he was glancing at you as well. You felt the stirring in your gut rise at that. He recovered by looking behind you and walking towards whatever was there— if there was anything at all. 

You kept a smile to yourself as he brushed past you. 

_Perhaps it wouldn’t be terrible at all…_

Still, you couldn’t just _tell_ the man… no, no, no. 

(He’ll just slither back into his cave and ward you off with a hiss.)

For once, you wished you were as skilled with flirtatiousness as you are with medicine. You knew how to charm and fluster, but your experience with _courting_ was limited to the pureblood men your father _insists_ on introducing to you at parties. 

And it’s not like you _haven’t_ been with people… it has just been scarce, never seriously… and _definitely_ never anyone as _intense_ as Severus. 

(Those eyes were undoubtedly intense… oh my.)

You ran a hand over your face as you realised you just admitted that you would like to _court_ Severus—

You blamed yourself for letting the thoughts of him _fester_ into a need to pursue him. All your rationalisation of gaining _nothing_ from it has been completely useless. 

Well, you supposed that was what an infatuation entailed.

_Merlin, you were infatuated with Severus!_ (You felt your face heat up as the thoughts came running through your mind once more.)

You sighed. 

Perhaps a bite of Alihotsy would take your mind off it for a bit. 

.

.

.

.

.

“ _Stop eating it,_ ” Severus scolded. Your hand stopped mid-air as you were about to sprinkle a pinch of finely chopped leaves on your tongue… for the fourth time. 

“Apologies, I haven’t had Alihotsy in awhile.” You smiled sheepishly and lowered your hand, “I wonder why the potion tastes so terrible with this in it.” 

“The potion tastes horrible?” Severus inquired in genuine surprise. 

“Well, Lupin certainly did not react kindly to it,” You replied, subconsciously licking the finger with the chopped leaves stuck to it. Severus pursed his lips and you saw his eyes flutter before recovering into a squint. 

“ _Stop it_ ,” He hissed. 

You realised what you had just done and felt your face heat up, hoping that the distance between the two of you rendered him unable to see your blush. 

“Sorry,” You mumbled half-heartedly and went back to work. 

* * *

The week continued much in the same manner; during the day, you visited Lupin to give his dose of Wolfsbane potion— the man still refused your offers of getting anything to wash it down, despite you seeing him have nothing at the ready, and at night you worked on the potion with Severus.

(Your menial paperwork felt like something you do in your spare time rather than work now.)

“I suppose we’re done,” Severus scanned the list of instructions for the last time, making sure everything was done accordingly, “…excellent work.” He said the compliment in the quietest voice. 

You smiled. The odd pull in your stomach rose to your chest. 

(It seemed that Dumbledore had been right, the potion was quicker to make with your help.) 

“Don’t we still have to let the potion ferment under the moonlight?” 

“I could do that on my own... if you’re occupied,”

“I’m afraid I will be,” You said, “I have to escort Lupin to the shack.” 

That had his full attention in an instant. 

“You’ll be _escorting_ _him_ to the shack?”

“The headmaster said it’s part of the job,” You shrugged. He didn’t even try to hide his scowl. “It’s not as if I’ll be standing there while he transforms…” 

Severus was about to say something but stopped himself. 

_How odd…_

“I’ll be by the lake,” He said in a clipped tone and walked away. 

_Very strange indeed…_

The feeling in your stomach suggested that perhaps… he cared about you. 

_No, no, no, no, no. How absurd._

You shook your head and left by the fireplace. 


	4. Trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By Merlin, instead of writing this chapter, I have been avid on writing the next (in the Summer) hOLY SH-   
> Look, if this slow burn is torturing you, just know it's torturing me too. lol. 
> 
> Thank you to Romancelover38, cherik, MiscreantBrat, EliDeetz, and LightOwl1505 for leaving comments in the previous chapter. I love you all so, so much. 
> 
> Enjoy!

“Be sure to cast _immobulus_ on the Whomping Willow,” Dumbledore explained. You were just discussing the path that will be taken to escort Lupin to the Shrieking Shack.

It wasn’t anything dangerous… except for the part where you would be travelling with a werewolf at dusk in a narrow underground passage past a tree that could kill you.

No wonder Severus worried— he did _not._

You sighed, wondering why Dumbledore insists that you escort the man. Perhaps the headmaster didn’t trust Lupin with his Lycanthropy as much as he lets on. 

_._

_._

You enter Lupin’s office with his last goblet of the week and found his desk empty. 

Perhaps the man wasn’t in yet, you _were_ a little bit early. 

Just as you were about to return to fetch something else, a movement in the back of the room caught your eye. You sidestepped the desk and approached the man sitting on the floor in the nook of the cabinet.

“Lupin?” You called. He was blankly staring at the desk with bloodshot eyes and a small scowl. 

You were expecting this. It was common for werewolves to show signs of Lycanthropy before the night of the fullest moon. That, coupled with the anxiety of transforming tonight, would surely make a very irritable Lupin. 

“Let’s get you up,” you gently grabbed his arm and pulled him to his feet. He shoved you away and snarled at you. 

“Stop it,” he hissed. You furrowed your eyebrows. 

“Stop what?” 

He rubbed his face and paced around the room. 

“The pity,” he spat, “the stares… everything.”

“Lupin, I apologise if—“

“Why?” He kept a considerable distance to you as if he was holding back. You kept a hand on the hilt of your wand, just in case. “ _Why?_ ” Lupin asked again. 

“Why what, Lupin?” You replied.

“Why are you doing this? Am I just some sick experiment that you can observe? I know your prejudices—“

" _I don't have any prejudices against you, Lupin._ ” You stated firmly. The man stilled and stared at you, his scowl replaced by deep confusion. “The only thing I dislike about you is your attitude towards your own Lycanthropy,” You said calmly, despite your rising annoyance.

“I…” He was dumbfounded. 

“You won’t even take a simple offer of a drink after the horrendous-tasting potion, despite not having anything.”

“I…” 

“Trust me a little, please. My job is to help you, not poison you,” you continued, “stop acting as if you have to thoroughly suffer.”

You slowly approached him and pulled him to sit by the desk. He complied without restraint and plopped down on the seat, a dazed look still on his face. 

“Now sit down and gulp the potion. I’ll go get you some ginger tea to wash it down.” 

.

.

When you got back with the mug of strong ginger tea, Lupin was gulping down the last drops of the potion. He took the mug out of your hands and waited a bit before swishing the tea in his mouth. 

“Better?”

“A little,” He mumbled. 

“I shall meet you by the Whomping Willow before dusk,” You said curtly and left no room to argue as you immediately left by the fireplace. 

* * *

You narrowly avoided students as you made your way to the Whomping Willow. Dumbledore offered that you travelled to Professor Sprout’s office first before walking down the greenhouses to the tree, but you did not want to intrude on her.

(Besides, considering what rumours she may have started last year between you and Severus…)

Most of the staff knew you were here, same as they knew of Lupin’s Lycanthropy. You can’t imagine how deranged Dumbledore must have looked, to let a Werewolf and a Black in the castle in these conditions. 

You stopped by the tree and waited for Lupin. 

“I think I can manage on my own,” he walked ahead to the willow, trying to avoid you. You caught up to him and cast _Immobulus_ at the tree just before he could. 

“I’ll learn to trust that you could, Lupin,” You said, “but for now, I barely trust you to finish your potion, so let me do my job and escort you.” Despite your words, you politely motioned to the passage entrance. 

He blinked and sighed, reluctantly proceeding down the path with you. 

.

.

.

.

“I shall stop by your quarters tomorrow,” You stopped by the entrance to the shack, “let me know if the potion works as well as it is intended.” 

Lupin nodded and entered the shack without a word. 

Does he still think you’re a judge against him? 

No matter, you could live with it as long as you get your job done. 

.

.

.

.

By the time you reached the castle, it was well past sundown. The moon was full in the sky and the grounds were blanketed in a faint glow. You put out your wand and walked briskly towards the entrance— 

A chill ran up your spine as a Dementor flew above you. 

You walked faster as you felt another one linger behind you. 

_Dumbledore was utterly mad. What if the Dementors mistake you for Sirius?_

You entered the castle and breathed a sigh of relief as the warmth enveloped you. However, the chill in your spine did not leave and you knew something was off…

.

.

The feeling did not fade as you travelled the dark corridors down to the dungeons.

Your suspicions were proven as you arrived by your quarters and saw Merlot perched on your table with a letter from your parents. 

 

You opened it and braced yourself for whatever it may contain. 

 

**(f/n),**

 

**The Ministry of Magic insisted on investigating our house, despite us explaining that ties to Sirius were terminated long ago. They had a warrant, signed by the Minister of Magic himself to rummage around our manor.**

**Of course, they found nothing, but they hinted that they will have repeated visits as long as Sirius is still at large.**

**Be warned, (f/n), they will likely visit you as well. As questionable as I find your practices sometimes, dear… I trust you will not harbour a blood traitor and deranged murderer in your house. I suggest you stay home for the coming month and calmly address the situation whenever they decide to _visit._**

**I am trying my best to keep my patience as an outburst will only escalate the situation further.**

 

Your father signed it in a seemingly hurried manner. 

 

Well…

This seems to be a problem. 


	5. The Ministry Watches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEYYO IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!!! (as of my time, 3rd June) 
> 
> Also I realise the last chapter was very short and no Severus... well, no Severus in this chapter too BUTBUTBUT I promise he'll be here in the next one... with a few... moments ;)   
> and on that note, since the next chapter is ready to go would you like me to update like on Wednesday or something?   
> Cause I'm just as impatient as you are for this story to finish. Let me know ok. 
> 
> Forgive me if I write Dumbledore a little weird, Merlin knows he's... well, Dumbledore.
> 
> Thank you to Pagewolf, Silverwolfwarrior13, October_Rain, and MiscreantBrat for leaving comments! And thank you to everyone who has left kudos! It's surreal how this fic has reached over 90 kudos already, my god I love you all. 
> 
> Enjoy the chapter!

"Forgive me for the intrusion, headmaster, but it seems I have a problem on my hands," you marched towards the headmaster's desk. 

Albus Dumbledore looked up over his half-moon glasses. 

"Is it Severus?" He immediately asked. You furrowed your eyebrows. 

"Huh?" 

“Never mind, what is it that troubles you?" 

That was oddly suspicious. You noted to inquire about it once the situation wasn't so horrible.

"The ministry would pay a surprise visit to my house and I have to be there lest they suspect anything related to Sirius Black," you explained. 

"Oh dear, that is a problem indeed." He took off his glasses and stroked his beard, "Have you finished the potion with Severus?" 

"I have," you replied, "and Lupin should return from the shack about now." 

"Then there's nothing stopping you from going home," he clasped his hands, "I shall notify you when you're needed here." 

"Of course." 

Now you only have to check on Lupin before you leave. 

.

.

.

You knocked on the door adjacent to Lupin's office. A shuffle could be heard inside and the door opened to reveal a very tired looking Lupin. 

"How are you feeling?" You asked the standard healer question. 

"Alright. Just a little tired..." He said meekly, "the potion works... really well." 

"Do you need anything?" 

"No, I just need a bit of bed rest," he gave you a reassuring look that said that he wasn’t trying to make himself suffer through it. 

You nodded and turned to leave when he spoke up.

"Uh, thank you... Black," he said with tremendous effort, "and Snape." 

He added the last part as an afterthought. Hilarious. You turned to him and saw genuine gratitude on his face. 

Perhaps he’s learnt to trust you a little bit.

"You're welcome, Lupin, and... call me (f/n)," you said without much certainty, "it must be really weird for you... as it is for me." 

It’s true. He was struggling with your last name as if it was a banned word. 

(Which, technically, it was…)

Lupin seemed surprised at the sentence. He relaxed a bit and managed a small smile. 

"Then, you can call me Remus," 

Well, you’ve just opened up an acquaintance with a werewolf. 

_Great._

Wait till your parents hear about this one. 

"Have a good day, Remus," you bid him and left. 

* * *

You returned home and an air of dust greeted you.

Well, you haven't been in your house awhile, perhaps you should make it look a bit lived in for the ministry officials. 

Merlin knows if they'll ask questions of your floo travels to Hogwarts, which would draw immediate suspicion. 

You took your wand and cast a few cleaning spells around the room. The dust lifted and a few things flew back to their places. 

You didn't own a house elf, despite your parents offering you to do so. You didn't enjoy treating them like vermin, and more so you liked your privacy. 

And you lived alone, so there wasn’t much mess anyway. 

You made your way to your study and lifted the dust off of everything there as well. 

A stack of letters on the table caught your eye. 

Who would be sending you letters? 

You picked one up and saw that your name was written in an odd sort of scribble, and your first name was almost misspelt. You opened it and found a beautiful caricature of a bird from the window of what you recognised as St Mungo's. 

On the back of it was a poorly written letter with a contrastingly beautiful signature from none other than Gilderoy Lockhart.

You opened another one and found a drawing of Miriam Strout of the Janus Thickey ward. It seems the woman has turn to treat Gilderoy like her own son.

Another one was a self-portrait of Gilderoy himself. He looked as clean as he ever was and happier than ever. 

The drawings didn't have any magical properties and seemed to be done in regular black ink and charcoal. 

Gilderoy never stopped being a gifted artist. 

You rifled through more of the letters and landed on the latest one. A swarm of black ink greeted you and you wondered what it was. 

You flipped the parchment and found small writing, the script already better than the first ones. 

**I don't really remember what he looks like, so I took a more artistic approach, as Miriam calls it.**

You realised it was a drawing of Severus. 

You chuckled. The parchment was mostly tinted black with only a few areas highlighted, mainly, his nose.

That was sweet of Gilderoy… Perhaps you should visit the hospital sometime if the ministry doesn't show up. You could also pretend you still work there in your office. 

* * *

A week passed and no sign of the ministry. You were beginning to grow tense from being holed up in your house doing nothing but paperwork.

It might be time to visit your office and return the documents, the ministry can wait if they decide to visit now. 

.

.

"(f/n)!" Gilderoy came running towards your office and had his arms around you in a hug. He hasn’t lost his child-like quality, it seemed. 

"It's nice to see you too, Gilderoy," you pat his back with a chuckle. He pulled away and sat by your desk, with a face that said he was ready to interrogate you. 

"Where have you been?" He said. 

You shushed him gently. 

"Please, not so loud, Gilderoy," you said, "I doubt the others have noticed me missing." 

"Well, it's true, Miriam certainly hasn't... and I haven't told her anything," he said innocently, "are you on some secret mission?" He whispered excitedly. You smiled.

"Of sorts, yes," you replied, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was away." 

"Oh, it’s no problem, I have lots of company here now. Did you get the sketches I sent you?" 

"Yes, Gilderoy, they're beautiful," you sat on your chair and went to reorganising the paperwork you’ve done over the month. 

"Have you seen that Severus fellow again on your mission?" 

"Why do you have this obsession with Severus?" You asked with an amused smile. 

"Well... You seem to like him a lot…”

_What—_

“And you seem stressed a lot lately... I thought maybe... He could make you less stressed? That’s why I drew a picture of him for you,” He shrugged, "I mean, I get less upset when I get the things I like... Miriam allowed me to have lilac curtains the other day and..." 

You zoned out from the rest of his ramblings.

Oh my, even Gilderoy has noticed your feelings... And he hasn't even seen you in awhile... Which means...

_Oh Merlin_ , were you really that obvious? Did Severus… notice?

You hummed in frustration. If anything, Severus makes you more stressed. 

And now is not the time to be thinking about him. 

"Is something wrong?" Gilderoy asked. 

"Nothing, I'm alright," you replied, looking at his worried expression, "Gilderoy... could you remember something for me?" 

"Uh, well, alright... I am getting better at remembering things."

"If some suspicious looking people visit you and ask about me, just say you don't know anything, okay?" 

"Okay," he said, looking serious, "does it have to do with your secret mission?" 

"Yes, also it's a secret, Gilderoy, so no more questions," you scolded playfully. He slumped in disappointment like a child. You laughed. "Well, in return for promising to keep my secret, you could ask about Severus instead. Maybe you could draw him a little better…” 

Gilderoy cheered and rushed to get his drawing tools.

.

.

 You returned home that night with a bundle of sketches from Gilderoy. He did five sketches of Severus based on your description and gave the one he thought was best to you, along with drawings of a few other things. 

You shoved the feeling in your gut for suggesting words like “handsome” and “beautiful” to describe him. 

In the end, he did achieve a good likeness, and… well, now you have a portrait of Severus with you. 

You slipped it in your drawer with the rest of the drawings. 

* * *

**Dear (f/n),**

 

**Severus has inquired about your whereabouts, it seems that it would be time to start the potion again tomorrow. I hope you've dealt with the ministry situation and can return soon.**

 

**Sincerely,**

 

**Albus Dumbledore**

It had been another week since your first visit to the hospital, and the ministry hasn’t shown themselves at your door. It was as if you were waiting for nothing. 

That's it, you decided that you'll wait just another day. Perhaps your parents were false in their suspicions that the ministry would come. 

You burned the letter Dumbledore sent you.

Just in case. 

* * *

It was noon the next day and you were just about to head out with the floo when you heard a knock on your front door.

Perfect timing. _Perfect._

You groaned.

Checking to make sure everything was in order, you made your way to the front and opened the door.

Two men with incredibly serious faces greeted you. You haven't seen any of them before.

Well, it would be smart to have unbiased investigators.

"We have a warrant, signed by the minister of magic," They showed you a piece of official document and you reluctantly let them in. 

"Please stay put while we search your house, ma'am," The other one said, and you nodded silently. There was no use fighting. You had nothing to hide anyway. 

They spent hours rummaging around your many medical textbooks, which you scolded them into putting back in the right order and scoured every room in your house. 

And your house wasn't at all small. It was a city residence clearly belonging to a rich person. 

You sighed and followed them to your study.

They rummaged around your drawers and pulled out several letters. 

"Who is this 'Gilderoy Lockhart'?" One of them asked. 

It seems people have forgotten about Gilderoy just as he forgot about the world. 

"A patient in St Mungo's Hospital," you answered simply. They had no right to interrogate you further.

"May we?" He opened the flap. 

"Well, you're not going to find anything but ramblings of a mad man," you shrugged. The man put the letter back in your drawer. 

.

.

It continued on for hours and you glanced at your clock to find that it was almost dinner. 

_You'll be late._

"Well, we've thoroughly searched your house," one of them declared. 

"And?"

"No sufficient evidence has been found. However," 

You had to fight the urge to outwardly groan.

"We will still be keeping a close watch. I'm sure you understand," he continued, "if anything is found, we will have a warrant to interrogate you." 

With that promise to visit again, they walked out the front door and disapparated. 

Certainly a very warm greeting from the ministry. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I have not forgotten about Gilderoy. He's your son now, I don't make the rules.   
> Well, actually I do make the rules.


	6. Bitter Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Due to popular demand... I updated! Hey, it's still my birthday, so special occasions are taken into account...
> 
> Thank you for all the birthday wishes!!! And cloudywishes, LightOwl1505, diahlilyn, FabulousDarling, Sac1i, Yuuchan_Hrabia, MiscreantBrat, alex, Nomorestoriesfriends, and wingspan2050 for leaving comments!!! 
> 
> and omg 100 kudos fUck I'm going to cry. in happiness. 
> 
> I fell asleep last night and woke up to your many comments and kudos... BEST way to wake up (and on my birthday too)! I love you all... /sobs
> 
> Enjoy the chapter you lovely people :3

“ _You’ve finally arrived_ ,” Severus said bitterly as you stepped out of your fireplace.

“My sincerest apologies, Severus, ministry officials came last minute and insisted on ransacking my house to find evidence of Sirius Black.” You said, matching his bitterness.

Severus dropped his scowl and raised an eyebrow at that. 

“That’s why I’ve been away,” you continued, “I see you’ve started without me. Where are we at, regarding the steps?” You were eager to get back to work to take your mind off the stress of the ministry.

He explained what he was doing and you quickly went back to the rhythm of working with him. 

There was a tense silence as neither of you dared to confide in the other. 

* * *

The next few days didn’t seem to ease his bitterness, or yours, for the matter.

You worked quietly the past nights and knew better than to ask him about his torment. He certainly wasn’t one who would share it with others.

Deep inside you wished that he would share it with you —

You stepped out of Remus’s fireplace and gave him his goblet. He gulped it down and barely gagged as he chased it down with ginger tea, which he had provided on his own. 

Perhaps you could ask him what the matter with Severus was… would he even know?

“Is everything alright, (f/n)?” Remus asked. Him using your first name was still odd, but at least he didn’t struggle with it like your family name. 

“I’m fine, Remus,” you said. He gave you an odd look. 

“Is it Snape?” 

Why is it that every time you seem to have a problem, they assume it’s related to Severus? First Dumbledore and now Remus… 

But you suppose he was right this time. Though…

“It’s not your concern,” you muttered dismissively. 

Remus nodded and backed off the topic, but you noticed an odd glint in his eyes.

* * *

Your question was answered when one night, Severus evacuated you to his sitting room and two students came in for detention. You could hear them gossip, their voices weren’t exactly quiet and they were positioned near the entrance of the room.

“Why is Snape so mad these days? I mean, he’s usually cross… but not this much,” One of them said. 

“Haven’t you heard the whole boggart incident?” 

“What?”

“Lupin had a class and Longbottom’s boggart was Snape. I heard they cast a spell that made boggart Snape wear a dress or something.” 

How humiliating. (Though you briefly wonder if Severus would look bad in a dress— the man usually wears a long flowing cape anyway— you shook your head vigorously.) 

However, if one of the student’s boggart is Severus then that means he’s utterly terrifying… well, he could be. You’ve seen that side of him before, when he menaced the former Defence teacher last year…

Suddenly you had a feeling that Severus would get back at Remus somehow. The two were fighting like teenage boys, honestly. 

You didn’t want to take part in it. 

You looked up at Severus and saw him scowling at the two students for chatting.

Perhaps you could help Severus without going against Remus. 

.

.

Severus was particularly testy after the students left, almost jeering at you as he gave out instructions. You noticed he kept clenching his jaw and pinching the bridge of his nose, occasionally massaging his temples.

“Is your head bothering you?” You asked, not looking up from the Alihotsy you were working on.

“It’s not your problem.” He hissed. 

“It is if you’re going to be an angry troll for the rest of the evening,” you hissed back, now looking up and giving him a stern glare. “Do you have tea? Preferably peppermint?”

“I don’t need your help,” he spat but fingered his temple once more as what you assume was a wave of pain from his migraine passing. 

You didn’t regard his answer and moved to the sink to wash the Alihotsy off your hands. Despite his outburst earlier he didn’t stop you from marching to his kitchen. 

“ _Accio_ peppermint tea,” 

A cabinet on the far right opened and you just barely caught the jar of tea leaves. You brewed the tea wordlessly and when you turned, Severus was at the doorway scowling at you. 

“Unclench your jaw, Severus, it’ll help,” you said, handing him the mug of tea you just made and walked past him. He grabbed the mug and pursed his lips, baffled at your nonchalance. 

You continued working as if nothing happened. He inspected you as he whiffed the tea and took a slow sip. His shoulders visibly relaxed and he growled, presumably annoyed that the tea was working. 

_Adorable._

You couldn’t keep your smile to yourself. He squinted at you as he put the mug down and continued working, remaining contently quiet for the rest of the night.

* * *

Remus gagged on the last potion of the week.

“Perhaps I could ask Severus if there’s anything to do about the taste?” 

You fought the urge to resent the man by being a little bit nicer to him. It was an odd strategy, but it was the only way you could avoid being openly hostile towards Remus. 

“Don’t bother,” Remus said in a light tone, “because he won't.”

“It would be worth a try,” you shrugged. 

“No, I wouldn’t suggest it,” he waved his hand in dismissal, “I know you’re… _friends_ , but he won’t listen to anyone for my benefit.” 

You notice he said the word “friends” in the oddest tone. What was that supposed to mean?

“It’s okay, (f/n), really. This ginger tea really helps,” he smiled and winked at you. 

You stared at him blankly. Remus was getting a bit too comfortable around you. 

“And I was about to say…” he continued, his tone now unsure, “you really don’t have to escort me tonight.” 

Huh… actually, that was a request you could get behind. The last time you escorted him, you almost became Dementor prey. 

At this point, he seemed to be trustworthy enough with his potion… and it’s not like getting to the shack would be impossible on his own. But it’ll feel like you’re shirking off your job… perhaps there was a middle ground to be achieved. 

“I’ll only escort you to the tree, then, and make sure you safely enter the passage,” you negotiated. 

“Alright, deal,” he nodded, held up his mug of tea in a toast.

.

.

.

You were sure he was getting too comfortable with you as he decided to lightly converse on the way to the tree. 

Well, it wasn’t his fault. You were on a first-name basis and frankly quite civil with one another. Remus took the cue that you were at least approachable. 

He only talked about minimal things like the weather at dusk, but still, he was avidly trying to talk to you.

You suppose it was more welcome than his initial dismissal and grouchiness. 

“Same as before, I will visit your quarters tomorrow,” you said as you reached the entrance after sufficiently immobilising the tree, “let me know if the potion works as well as before.”

“I’m sure it will,” he smiled, “have a good night, (f/n).”

“Would it be prudent of me to say ‘you too’?” you said, finding yourself joking.

Remus laughed heartily and entered the passage. 

You really were letting him get comfortable. 

_Sigh._

Hogwarts seemed to have you accidentally befriending people… _again._


	7. Scheming and Confusion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, it's already Friday again in my hour and though it means I update, it also means exams are approaching fast! The update after this on Monday will be the last Monday update before I take a week or two off to focus on exams. If I feel particularly inspired and a chapter comes out, it'll most likely be on next Sunday or so. (And I might be, considering I am a walking disaster...)
> 
> Thank you for more birthday wishes! and thank you MiscreantBrat, Chillcarrot, October_Rain, Silverwolfwarrior13, and EliDeetz for leaving comments on the last chapter! I see a lot of recurring names and I thank you so much for sticking with this story. 
> 
> And thank you to my friend Definitely Not Tofu for reading and leaving a comment. You don't even like Snape and you read my fic, why? I've also told you the whole plot of this thing and still here you are. 
> 
> On that note, please do not spoil the plot to the others and everyone else don't go ask Tofu— or em, Definitely Not Tofu for any spoilers XD 
> 
> Enjoy!

"(f/n), you're daydreaming again," Gilderoy waved a hand in front of your face. 

You had returned home once more after checking on Lupin and found yourself in the Hospital talking to Gilderoy. 

"I was thinking about... work." 

"No, you don't smile about work, (f/n)," he finished the sketch he's working on and showed you the picture, your smile widened a little. "Aha! You’re thinking about that Severus fellow!"

"That's absurd, Gilderoy," despite your words you took the flattering sketch of Severus and inspected it. You really couldn't wipe the smile off your face. 

Severus had been quiet since that night you gave him tea, and when he did speak it was in a meek voice and he avoided your eyes entirely.

The man was so timid… you wonder if you would ever get anywhere with him at this rate— _Not that you wanted to._

_Sigh._ Gilderoy was right, you _were_ thinking about Severus. 

" _(f/n)_ ," he teased, smiling cheekily. 

"I know, Gilderoy. _Shush_ ," you held your head in your hands but still, the smile remained. 

* * *

The ministry visited just in time again and you wonder if they actually knew your schedule, just to purposely meddle with it.

The same two men searched your house and found nothing but medical textbooks once more. 

To your surprise, it was an hour before dinner when they were called away. You vaguely heard there was some urgent business somewhere else as they stepped out of your house and disapparated. 

No matter, you could now enjoy dinner and see Severus earlier. 

.

.

You realise it was Severus's turn to be late as you took the floo directly to his office and found it empty. 

The worktable had a lot of the key ingredients missing and the tools were nowhere to be found.

Odd. Perhaps he had another urgent business to attend to. 

You started assembling the ingredients from the shelf. He wouldn't mind if you started earlier, you're sure. 

.

.

“You remember the conversation we had, Headmaster, just before the start of term?” Severus proceeded cautiously.

“I do, Severus,” said Dumbledore, and there was something like warning in his voice. 

“It seems— almost impossible, that Black could have entered the school without inside help. I did express my concerns when you appointed—” 

“I do not believe a single person inside this castle would have helped Black enter it,” Dumbledore said, and his tone made it so clear that the subject was closed that Severus didn’t reply. “I must go down to the Dementors, I said I would inform them when our search was complete.” The headmaster suddenly turned as he remembered something, and leaned close to Severus to whisper. “Why don’t you make sure our own Ms. Black is safe? I worry Filch might suspect something if he finds her in the dungeons.” 

Severus rushed out of the hall. 

“What was that about?” Weasley mouthed. Potter and Granger traded confused yet concerned looks. 

.

.

The door burst open and you were prepared to see Severus march towards you in fury… instead, you met the eyes of Argus Filch, holding up a lantern to your face. 

“Well, well… it seems I _have_ found a Black in the dungeons." He jeered. 

What in Merlin's name— 

"Get your hands off me, you filthy squib!" 

You had your wand already drawn when a flow of black robes obscured your view of Filch. 

"Professor Snape," Filch backed away but held a suspicious stare, "I reckon the headmaster would have a field day to discover that you are harbouring a Black." He accused. 

"Mr. Filch, on the contrary, it appears that Dumbledore has not deemed you trustworthy enough to disclose the information that Ms. (f/n) Black is here to assist me with the Wolfsbane Potion," Severus menaced, "I trust you can now leave and ask the headmaster himself as well as other _important_ staff members to confirm this." 

There goes Severus being threatening again. It was definitely attractive when it’s working to your favour—

Filch lowered his lantern and pressed his lips in a firm line. After a few moments, he finally relented and gave you another suspicious glare before reluctantly leaving the room.

"What's happening Severus? Why is the squib searching the dungeons?" You put away your wand and brushed the imaginary filth off your arm.

Severus blinked as he was just then reminded of your inherited traits. 

"It appears that Sirius Black has managed to enter the castle and tampered with the portrait of the Fat Lady," 

Did he just say “enter”?

"Was anyone hurt? Has he been found?” 

“No to both, the castle has been searched and there seems to be no sign of him. The ministry has been notified along with the Dementors. I’m sure he’ll be caught soon…”

There was a scheming look on his face and he was about to say something when you spoke up. 

“Ah,” you said in epiphany, “the ministry officials that were at my house today left early due to urgent business… I wonder…”

“Then it works in your favour since it’ll rule you out of involvement.”

You nodded, “and what of the Gryffindors? Doesn’t the Fat Lady lead to the Gryffindor common room?” 

Severus raised an eyebrow but kept the question to himself.  

“Everyone has been moved to sleep in the hall for the time being," he said, pursing his lips in thought. "Would it be possible to move tomorrow's task to the afternoon? I reckon Dumbledore would have me do a round of searching again after dinner." 

"Sure, I don't have a problem with that." 

* * *

The potion-making continued to be placed in the afternoon. You started giving Remus’s potion of the week and he seemed to be taking it better already— he had his own ginger tea now.

You were just filling the goblet with the day’s Wolfsbane Potion when the fireplace crackled into green flames. Who could be visiting Severus? Should you— 

"Remus?"

Severus's head immediately snapped up from his work to you. 

"I was just about to bring you your potion," you said to Remus, confused. 

"I know, I came here to see Professor Snape, actually," Remus replied. Severus turned his attention towards him with a suspicious stare. "You see, my third year class tomorrow coincides with the full moon. I asked for a substitute and Dumbledore suggested I see you." 

_How very Dumbledore…_ Perhaps it was an effort to have the two men be civil. 

Severus replied with a nod.

Well, that was somewhat civil, right? 

"Great, I trust you can pick out a topic from the textbook to your liking." Remus turned to you, "Would you like to give it to me now or will you visit my office later?" 

_What in Merlin's name was that wording..._

In the corner of your eye, you could make out Severus suddenly gripping the handle of the ladle he's using to stir the Aconite mixture. 

You absently handed Remus the goblet of the potion, trying to make sense of what is going on. 

"I don't have anything to wash it down, though,"

"There's no need," Remus winked at you with a smile. 

**_SNAP!_ **

You noticed Remus covering his grin as he hastily exited through the fireplace with the potion.

Turning to Severus, you saw him cast Reparo on the ladle he just… snapped in half.

_What in the name of Merlin is happening—_

"(f/n)..." he said, face still red in anger though he returned to stirring the Aconite mixture as if nothing happened. The seemingly nonchalant act unsettled you. "...could you stay for dinner? I have something I wish to discuss." He said evenly. 

_Did he… did he just—_

No, you reminded yourself that it was foolish to hope. You notice the scheming look from days ago was back again and you begin to question his intentions. 

You quietly nodded to Severus and figured you'll find out soon enough.

.

.

.

“What is it that you would like to speak about?” You finally spoke. Severus had been content to let you squirm in your seat and watch him eat, making you question him even more. 

“I’d like to talk about your patient, actually,” Severus said.

_Ah._ Perhaps your suspicions were correct. 

_Sigh._

Your tiny sliver of hope vanished. It really was impossible to get _anywhere_ with this man.

“Remus?” 

Severus’s eye twitched a little at your use of his first name. 

“Yes,” Severus replied, “I’ve voiced my concerns about him to the Headmaster but he wouldn’t listen.”

“And what exactly are your concerns?” You raised your eyebrow, eager to at least see where he was going with this.

“I suspect he’s helping Sirius Black into the castle,” Severus stated plainly. 

_This should be interesting._

“How so?” 

“It wouldn’t be above him to help an old friend,” 

_Well, now he’s just grasping at straws…_

You flared your nostrils as you realised something.

Was he trying to use you against Remus? Your gut filled with annoyance and disappointment… perhaps even a hint of betrayal. 

“You need more than that, I’m afraid, Severus,” you sipped your drink, “I’m sure Dumbledore has already said as much.” 

He pursed his lips and let his eyes lock onto yours. For the first time since you met him this year, you felt a tug in your mind. 

“ _Don’t,_ ” you threatened, scowling at him. He raised an eyebrow in surprise and the tug vanished. “What exactly do you want, Severus? For us to ally against Remus?” You asked cautiously, “If you provide sufficient evidence then _perhaps_ I would… however, for now…”

You could see him work his jaw. He didn’t dare say anything.

“…I refuse to take part in whatever animosity that is present between the two of you. It disturbs my work ethic.” You stated with finality. 

He fixed his stare into yours one last time and you felt a faint tug before he silently returned to his food. 

You kept your eyes on him and saw his handsome face was now creased with a frown. 

Despite what he just did— or _tried_ to do, you wanted to kiss his scowl away—

You scolded yourself and gripped your fork. 

Why were you smitten by such a prick?

_Smitten._ Merlin help you… 

You violently stabbed the fork into your food.

“Have you decided on what to teach Defence this Friday?” You asked casually, trying to break the tense silence. Severus looked up at you with a watchful stare. 

“Werewolves,” he muttered and looked back to his food once more.

_What a prick._

“Severus that’s cruel,” you scolded. 

“I’d say we would be on even footing,” 

You knew he was referring to the Boggart incident. Well, another thing you got right about Severus.

“I doubt the students would be bright enough to get it anyway.” He closed, seemingly ready to back out of the conversation. 

Well, there was at least _one_ student bright enough… 

You choose not to respond as you promised yourself that you would not get involved in their antics… and looking at his passive face, you decided you’ve menaced him enough.

You finished off your plate and curtly bid him goodnight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyyyyy dinner didn't go as you hoped huh? Don't worry, wait till Monday for the next one... I know you can't be mad at Severus for too long. ;)


	8. Uncovered

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I'm an impatient author ok, and I figured if I uploaded 12 AM like I usually do, it'll still be a Sunday for you so... why not upload now. Tomorrow I have exams anyway so gotta sLEEP I hope I wake up to all your lovely comments, it'll push me through this hellish week, I'm sure. 
> 
> You'll see why I'm so impatient to upload this one... hehe
> 
> Last "Monday" (it's not even Monday) update, I'll go back to weekend updates next week cause exams. 
> 
> Thank you to Endermei, LightOwl1505, Yuuchan_Hrabia, Sac1i, Pagewolf, MiscreantBrat, Silverwolfwarrior13, Ayushi, and EliDeetz for leaving comments in the previous chapter! And thank you to everyone who left kudos!!! and you who may have read this in a later date and left comments after I wrote this!!! THANK YOU EVERYONE ILY SO MUCH
> 
> Enjoy!

“Remus, could you please explain your odd behaviour yesterday?” you said as he finished the potion. 

You didn’t really want to engage in a lengthy conversation with him… but the question had been nagging in your brain overnight. 

"Odd behaviour?" He said innocently. You knew he was just dragging you along as you saw the smile behind his cup. 

You stepped closer to him and folded your arms, looming over his desk. 

He looked up from his mug of ginger tea and held up his hands.

"I was proving a theory of mine."

"Theory?" You furrowed your eyebrows. 

"Yes," he went back to sipping his tea. 

"Remus," you warned. It was the day of the full moon but he seemed playful instead of testy like last month. You suppose the symptoms vary from time to time.

"I'm not sure you want to hear what it is, (f/n)," he said simply. 

"I'm sure I'll give it at least some thought," you almost challenged. He smiled a cheeky smile.

"Severus Snape _fancies_ you—"

"That's preposterous," you scoff, trying to keep your composure. The sliver of hope from last night returned like fire and you could feel your face heat up.

Remus gestured with his hands and gave you a pointed look. 

"Surely you jest, Remus," you commented. 

" _Of course, (f/n),_ " he drawled sarcastically and hid his grin behind his mug once more, "if I may ask, what did he do after I left yesterday?" 

"He... invited me to dinner?" You said almost to yourself. Remus choked in laughter. 

You pursed your lips in thought, not knowing what to believe anymore. Remus rivalled your gut feeling in terms of spewing foolish hope. 

"He used it to speak about... you, though, Remus," 

"I'm not surprised," he was still strangely enjoying this. Wait till you tell him— 

You didn't want to take part in their games, but Remus deserved to at least know, right?

"Do you know what he's teaching your class later?" 

Remus sighed, apparently already knowing the answer.

"Let him have at it," he said, "I only hope the students won't suspect."

"Granger would suspect," you said. Remus perked up— almost like a canine, really, and raised an eyebrow at you. 

"You know Miss Granger?" 

"I met her during the Chamber of Secrets ordeal last school year," you suddenly remembered speaking to her in the Hospital Wing, cat ears and tail... "How is she, these days?" You tried to seem nonchalant about it all. 

Remus seemed all too pleasantly surprised at the question. 

"She's brilliant, I've not seen a student as eager as she is to learn," Remus said with a smile and continued gushing about his students. The third years seemed to all be fond of him, except for Draco, who you noticed Remus avoided mentioning. 

He's just too afraid to offend you, perhaps.

.

.

.

"You know, (f/n), I've always wondered why you've taken on this job," Remus asked as you walked to the Whomping Willow. You had been talking to him for the rest of the afternoon and found yourself enjoying the conversation you tried to avoid. 

"To be honest, I don't know myself, Remus," you said, "I seem to be drawn to going against my family values, despite my desire not to."

Remus chuckled at that. 

"On that note, I suggest you don't disclose of... Severus, or whatever it is you may suspect of him." 

"Who would listen to a 'half-breed' like me?" He shrugged easily.

"Fair point.” 

You exchanged amused smiles. 

You reached the Willow Tree and cast _Immobulus_ while Remus looked over the plains. 

There weren't any Dementors in sight, though the figure a few ways down could just as easily be mistaken as one...

"What's he doing here? I thought he said he'd be by the lake..." you mused out loud. 

"Maybe he wanted to make sure I don't nab you," Remus said with a grin. 

"Shut it, Remus," you shoved him to the passage entrance as he laughed. 

"Go talk to him, (f/n)," He threw over his shoulder, "make sure he didn't scare away my students." 

With a wink, he disappeared into the darkness.

.

.

You walked over to Severus and saw he had his sleeves rolled up as he took his hand out of the cauldron full of Wolfsbane Potion. 

“Severus?” You’ve never seen him so animated; he visibly jumped and hid his left arm behind his back as he swivelled in place to turn to you. He breathed out the tiniest of sighs as he saw it was only you. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be escorting…” Severus’s eyes glanced to the Whomping Willow in the distance. 

“I have.”

He gave you a suspicious look but didn’t comment. 

"How was class?" You asked casually.

“They didn’t seem to… suspect,” he answered almost too quickly.

How odd, you didn’t even bring up yesterday’s subject. 

Perhaps he’s trying to get back into your good graces…

You crossed your arms and raised an eyebrow at him. There was something like conflict on his face as he shifted his weight from one leg to another. 

“I did not intend to... offend you, if I did.” The sentence was said in a murmur. If it wasn’t quiet outside, you wouldn’t have heard him at all. He pressed his lips in a thin line and turned back to the cauldron as if he didn’t say anything.

You supposed that was the most of an apology you were going to get from him. He looked uncomfortable enough already, so you gave him an approving nod. His posture seemed to relax a bit and you couldn’t help but let your eyes peek a glance at the arm behind his back. He moved to obscure it even more. 

“No use hiding, Severus, you know I’ve seen it,” you said nonchalantly. He quirked his eyebrow in surprise. “Not on you, of course.”

He knew exactly who you meant. 

He moved his arm from behind him and you had a good look at the mark as he slowly pulled down his sleeve. 

The symbol was barely visible, looking like a faint red scar.

You suddenly wonder if there was anything that could remove it. A spell, or potion perhaps? It would require extensive research— You glanced up just as you felt a faint tug in your mind and found Severus staring at you just as intently. His eyes reflected the glow of the sunset and his hair flew to his face as a gust of wind blew past.

Severus always seemed so ethereal under the perfect lighting…

You wanted to kiss him right then and there—

You sighed and barely noticed your breath coming out in a frosty mist. Severus’s eyes flickered upwards. 

“GET BEHIND ME!” 

You had no time to react as he pulled you aside and took out his wand. 

“ _Expecto Patronum!_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aha... I left you on such an ending, I feel so evil. I gotta go study (not) now see ya hehehehehehee. ;)
> 
>  
> 
> ~~Yes, Lupin ships it~~


	9. A New Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI   
> exams are shit, I am a disaster and writing this is my antidepressant as well as reading all your lovely comments. Don't worry, my grades should be fine, I think... ~~I'm supposed to be studying calculus rn but well...~~
> 
> Also I felt so evil for leaving you all (and myself) with that cliffhanger. Haha
> 
> Thank you to pollinger, Romancelover38, Kitanni, Cherry_Popsicle, MiscreantBrat, Sac1i, wingspan205, N, Silverwolfwarrior13, Metrasol, EliDeetz, Yuuchan_Hrabia, LightOwl1505, JustAnotherSnapeLover, A Big Fan, cloudywishes, and ClusterxAmaryllis for leaving such wonderful comments! sO many sweet comments and kudos I'm going to die from happiness. 
> 
> this one's almost 2K maybe I shouldn't have left you with that cliffhanger before... hehehehe
> 
> Enjoy!

"Get in the castle!" Severus barked, holding up his wand as a glowing white mist appeared from it. 

You ducked just in time as another Dementor flew past Severus directly towards you. 

"GET IN THE CASTLE!"

You darted from behind him to the gates, a frosty chill running up your spine as you do. The Dementors flew away as you stepped foot inside and you almost saw the bright mist take the form of a four-legged animal before Severus abruptly pulled you inside. 

He silently dragged you through the castle and you could see that his face was contorted into a menacing scowl as his hair blew back from how fast he was walking. 

(You almost tripped on his cape, again.)

He stopped by the dungeon stairs and turned to inspect you. You knew you were shaking, that odd chill up your spine still prevalent. His eyes softened and you realised the scowl wasn't meant for you as he said, "Go to your quarters, I have something to discuss... with the headmaster." 

"Severus—" you wanted to insist that he shouldn't make a big deal of it and you could just talk to Dumbledore yourself, but he tipped his head towards the stairs and said in a soft voice, "Go."

He didn't leave until you were sufficiently down the stairs out of sight. 

You entered your quarters and shivered as you realised how cold it was. Shakily, you waved your wand to the fireplace and lit it. 

No wonder Severus insisted, you probably looked like you could fall over any minute. 

You decided some hot cocoa will do you good and waved your wand towards the kitchen. Letting the magic do its work, you set out to your bathroom for a warm shower.

.

.

.

You were half asleep with a mug of cocoa on the sofa when there was a knock on your door. 

You knew it was Severus— who else could be knocking? Couldn’t he wait till morning to tell you whatever he concluded with Dumbledore?

You got up with a sigh and opened the door. His eyes swept over your form and immediately averted to the side.

Oh, _right_ … You were in a bathrobe. 

You were too sleepy to care, honestly, your hair was most likely tousled from laying on the sofa and your face looked dead tired— damned Dementors.

It wasn't a flattering sight... yet Severus was blushing. 

_Maybe Remus was right._

You gripped the door tighter.

"You will no longer be required to escort Lupin," he stated, looking at the doorframe. His hands went to his back and you knew he was fidgeting. 

Curse Severus for being so adorable... for letting you see his mark... for shielding you from a Dementor... (for looking so good all the while…) for being irritated at Dumbledore on your behalf...

You wanted to kiss him— perhaps you just might… Perhaps it's time to stop playing games.

"Severus?" 

Before he could turn his head, you leaned up and pecked him square on the cheek. He didn't back away or flinch, he just stood there frozen with his eyes wide. 

"Thank you," you said sincerely. You guessed that your flushed faces matched each other’s now. The errant beating of your heart coupled with the warmth in your gut repelled all your drowsiness and you felt wide awake.

_You just kissed Severus— a chaste and innocent kiss, but a kiss nonetheless._

After what seemed like a good minute, he slowly turned his gaze to you. His dark eyes were still dilated in surprise, but you could see something else in them— you didn't know what it was exactly… but it seemed to melt away his timidness a great deal. 

He blinked and squared his shoulders, the newfound fire shining in his eyes. It was almost like the look he has when he was going to say something witty or snarky. You expected him to say something along those lines but instead he uttered "Good night, (f/n)," with almost a smirk and turned to walk to his door.

_Such a strange man._

You closed the door and leaned on it. Your heart was still beating loud and you felt out of breath.

Severus just let you kiss him… and he reacted _positively?_ Well, it’s quite hard to tell with the man, but it was definitely not a negative response— If you let your gut talk, you might even consider that he… liked it.

And what was that curious light in his eyes? You felt like the word was on the tip of your tongue and it frustrated you to no end. 

You sighed in exasperation. 

Unfortunately, you'll have to wait a few weeks before you could do anything to find out. If you could jinx the ministry officials, you would. 

* * *

"Good morning, Remus," you greeted as he opened the door.

" _'Good morning'_? What happened to you?" Remus grinned.

"Nothing," you quipped, "though I have to inform you that I no longer have to escort you to the shack."

"So something did happen," his grin widened. 

"How are you feeling?" You dodged.

"I'm fine, the potion works just as well," he answered, still giving you a suspicious look, "but I think I might feel better if you tell me what happened with Severus?" 

"What makes you think it has anything to do with Severus?" 

Remus gave you a pointed look. 

"A Dementor almost attacked me, Remus," you sighed.

"Oh dear, have you had some chocolate?" Remus's face turned to concern. 

"I have.” 

“Wait… _almost_?” Remus’s smile returned, “Did he…?” 

You crossed your arms and looked away. 

"...yes." 

"How romantic..." he snickered. 

" _Shush_ ," you scolded playfully, "anything I can get you before I go?" 

"No, I feel great, especially after that news," he laughed. 

"You're incorrigible, Remus," you shook your head, "see you next month." 

"See you, (f/n)." 

* * *

You took out Gilderoy's drawing of Severus.

_Was that light always there? Perhaps you just never noticed it before?_

As it always does, curiosity got the best of you and kept you on your toes. Only this time it wasn't medical or work-related... 

Huh, lately you didn't even bother with work. Paperwork was mostly done and all you needed was to reorganise your office. You wonder who has been filling in your attendance... Could you get demoted? 

You didn't want to get demoted now. Sure the desk job was a bore, but it gave you ample time to disappear and see Severus.

You made it sound like you were in a relationship already— 

You set down the portrait and leaned back in your chair. 

What would a relationship with Severus even entail? Could the man even be affectionate? Was he even capable of... caring...? 

Well, his actions as of late proved that he cared about you enough— _Merlin..._ you were definitely going to be disowned at this rate. 

Might as well make it worthwhile, then…

Now, how would you go about finding out what that strange fire in his eyes was? 

* * *

"Ah, Ms. Black! I just got this letter, it's for you," one of the young healers working in the front desk gave you a small envelope. They didn't allow owls inside simply due to hygiene issues, so letters get delivered to the receptionist. You thanked them and went straight to your office, wondering why it got delivered here instead of your house. Perhaps the owl was sent to track you, not your address.

You turned over the envelope and found the Hogwarts crest on the wax seal. Furrowing your eyebrows, you question why Dumbledore has sent a letter so early. 

You tore open the seal and found handwriting much more narrow than the headmaster's. 

 

**Return by the 1st.**

**-S**

 

Severus...? The feeling in your gut threatened to overwhelm you. It was the tiniest of gestures but it proved that brand new fire in his eyes did something to him. 

_Was it confidence? Determination?_

You breathed a frustrated sigh and looked up just as you heard steps enter your office.

"(f/n), look what I made!" Gilderoy rushed in with a small canvas in hand. He turned it around to show you a self-portrait... and it was moving. 

"Gilderoy, that's impressive!" You said in genuine surprise. The Gilderoy in the painting smiled, matching the real one standing in front of you. He set the painting down and sat across from you.

He leaned in to whisper, "(f/n), the strange men did come to visit me." 

_Oh dear…_

"What did they say?" 

"They asked me where you were," he looked at his shoes, "I said I don't know, maybe she's sick." 

Well, that's alright, as far as white lies go.

"Did they say when they were coming back?"

"Yeah, they're coming..." Gilderoy held his chin in thought, "...today?" 

" _Today?_ " You exclaimed, Gilderoy jumped. You looked around and your eyes landed on Severus's letter. 

As cryptic and brief as it was, the ministry would surely suspect if they found it. You sighed and reluctantly set it on fire. 

"Gilderoy, I'm sorry, you have to go. They can't see you in here," you told him. He pouted but nodded in understanding and grabbed his painting as he left the room. 

A few moments pass as you tried busying yourself with papers until a hard knock sounded at your door. You opened it to reveal the two ministry men standing in the hall. They held up a different warrant to search your office. 

You let them in before anyone outside could make a scene. 

.

.

"Could you unlock this?"

"No," you said without missing a beat, "whatever warrant you have, patient records are confidential." 

The man worked his jaw as he realised you knew some of the law. 

Of course you did, medical laws and confidentiality were the first things you learned in healer school. 

You really, really, wanted to jinx them now. 

.

.

After trying to get into several file cabinets, they eventually gave up as there was really nothing to be searched in your office. 

You watched them leave and saw Gilderoy giving you a thumbs up down the hall. You smiled at him and gave him a thumbs up back. 

.

.

 

You clocked out that evening and arrived home. After dinner, you found Merlot tapping at your window curiously. You groaned and wondered what your father could possibly write this time.

 

**(f/n),**

 

**I regret to inform you that we will not be hosting a Christmas dinner this year due to everything that's happening with the ministry. My nearest colleagues trust me but I see some others turn their heads when I go to work no doubt due to our family name.**

**I wholly curse Sirius Black for tainting our name as such. He does not deserve to even wear it. I hope he will be caught soon.**

**Either way, we hope you'll have a great holiday without us— not that you'd come usually but... You get my point, dear.**

 

**With Love,**

 

Your father's loopy sign ended it. 

 

Well, another Christmas dinner you weren't going to miss… and this time you don’t have any work that you could pour yourself into. 

You’d be spending the holidays by yourself— you didn’t really mind, but…

You held your head in your hand as a terrible idea came to your mind. 

_No, no, no… Severus wouldn’t… would he?_

Though at this point, what can you lose? If this works well, you might even get to discover what that blaze in his eyes was. 

 

_Sigh._

 

It was decided. You’ll swallow your pride and invite him to Christmas dinner. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are fiNALLY FINALLY happening, gOD IT HAS BEEN SO LONG and so slow i don't even know how I, the author has survived it. Like this ain't even nothing yet, but bOI 
> 
> Also I actually asked author friends of mine if 30K words in is good for a chaste kiss on the cheek, that's how slow burn i want to be. To be fair there are slower burns but nO I CAN'T HANDLE IT ANYMORE (bangs table) 
> 
> (Apologies, I'm a bit unstable due to exam stress lol.)


	10. Invitation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY GUESS WHAT you've heard of binge-reading, now let me introduce you to binge-writing. 
> 
> I swear I'm writing this to avoid succumbing to the stress of Calculus exam tomorrow. Yes, thank you for all the good lucks, I sincerely hope it'll help cause I don't know anything /cries
> 
> Thank you to Romancelover38, Sac1i, ClusterxAmaryllis, LightOwl1505, itisunreal, Silverwolfwarrior13, Wingspan2050, Endermei, Spezler, Metrasol, MiscreantBrat, Yuuchan_Hrabia, and Cherry_Popsicle for all the lovely comments in the last chapter! I love that you all are freaking out over the peck on the cheek. Like, to be fair, I am too but the difference is I already know the whole plot to everything and might I just say, this ain't nothin yet!
> 
> Also, I think that I'm behind on like, chapter counts. The whole Christmas ordeal was supposed to be here in 10, but it didn't quite feel right. So this fic might be more than 15? Idk we'll see. ~~I want it in fives though cause... satisfying?~~
> 
> Enjoy!

Asking him to dinner might be harder than you thought, you mused as you saw him walk down the hall. He had an old, worn-looking Slytherin scarf on his neck and he was shaking wet snow from his hair. 

_That's cute..._

You realised you had said it out loud as he looked up and raised his brow. 

_Shit._

"You still keep your old Slytherin scarf?" You said, feigning nonchalance. 

"Don't you?" He gave a last comb through his hair with his fingers. 

_That's so adorable..._

You wonder if he was doing it on purpose as you caught a glimpse of that new glint in his eyes.

"I'm sure it's in the back of my closet somewhere," you muttered. 

"You're here early," he said as he unlocked his door. 

"Yes, I was wondering if we could..." you looked at him as he stood in his doorway, "...start the potion early? I have some Christmas preparations to do." 

For that dinner you wanted to invite him to, but that’s beside the point.

"Very well, we could start now, if you'd like," he stepped aside to make way for you to enter. 

"It's not even dinner yet, Severus," you said with an eyebrow raised. 

_What's with the eagerness? Y_ ou honestly didn’t mind, but it was surprising, to say the least.

"We may prepare and have dinner in between..." He said, shifting his gaze to the side. Severus still had that timidness about him but the fact that he even asked—

Did he just beat you to a dinner invitation? Well, it wasn't exactly an invite but...

Astonishing how a peck on the cheek could change him like that... Maybe you should kiss him again and see what that would result—

You stepped inside, hoping he didn't notice the slight flush on your cheeks.

.

.

Severus handed you a jar of Galanthus Nivalis and you flinched as your hands brushed.

"Severus your hands are ice cold," you commented.

He looked at his hand as if he didn't even _consider_ it could be cold.

You shook your head at him and turned away before you did something stupid, like say, hold his hands to warm them.

.

.

Looking at him like this, you didn't even know how to bring up the subject of Christmas dinner. 

You had been stealing glances at him, unsure what to say and all the while trying to catch that light in his eyes to decipher what it was. 

Severus looked up as he caught you staring for the umpteenth time.

"Something on your mind?"

You swear the corners of his lips were twitching upwards. He was enjoying your struggle, as he always did. Only this time, it seemed he knew he was purposely causing it. 

"I just remembered," you hurriedly came up with something, "I won't be able to make sure Lupin takes his potion next full moon. Perhaps I could just leave all of it with him—"

" _No_ , Severus interjected, "I'll do it."

_What?!_

"Severus, you don't have to, I'm sure h—"

"I'm _not_ so sure," he stated with an almost menacing calm. 

There he was, going out of his way for you again... first with Dumbledore and now Remus. He was obviously distrustful of Remus but you knew that he didn't want anything to do with the Werewolf... and yet he's volunteering to tend to him... for you? 

_Maybe Remus really had a point there about him fancying you…_

You swallowed heavily. 

"Well, if you're certain, Severus..." 

He nodded and easily went back to his food.

Why was he doing all this? That strange light in his eyes rose your curiosity even more. 

You cursed under your breath as you saw him tuck a strand of hair behind his ear. You swore he was doing it deliberately... 

Perhaps you'll try to ask him about dinner tomorrow when you're not so flustered by him.

* * *

"Remus, I’m afraid I won't be here for the rest of the week," you said as you gave him his first dose of potion.

"Oh?" 

"I have Christmas preparations to do, I hope you understand,"

"It'll be fine, I manage fine on my own already—" 

"Ah, about that," you clasped your hands in front of you. Remus looked at you curiously. "Severus insisted he keeps an eye on you while I’m away..." 

"Did he really?" 

You nodded. 

"He really does fancy you, doesn't he?" Remus smiled behind his glass. 

"Why must you always go back to that?" You ran a hand over your face mostly just to cover up your blush.

"Because you're in denial," he teased. 

You groaned from behind your palm.

" _I am not_ ," you muttered, already backing away to the fireplace. You really weren’t. Wait till Remus hears that you kissed him— no, no, you probably shouldn’t tell him, he’ll tease you to no end. Besides, there was something special in that moment you’d like to keep to yourself. “Since you seem to have no qualms about it, have fun with Severus, then. Happy Holidays, Remus.” 

"Happy Holidays, (f/n). Grab a mistletoe and—" 

You disappeared into the flames before he could finish.

.

.

.

You watched as he wrapped up all his tools in a leather bind. 

The potion-making week had passed too fast for your liking as you still didn't muster the courage to invite him to dinner.

What was the significance of it anyway? It's just _one_ dinner... you've had many dinners with Severus before. 

Well, for one, it will be just the two of you enclosed in your city residence. Merlin knows what will happen— maybe _nothing_ will. You shook your head and found that he was staring at you intently. 

“Severus,”

It's now or never. You promised yourself no more games.

"Hm?" 

_Oh Merlin, he's so handsome—_

"Since you've been so nice to me as of late, would you like to come to Christmas dinner?"

He blinked in surprise and regarded you cautiously.

"I have no desire to take part in your family affairs," he said meekly, hands clasped in front of him. That light in his eyes was bright as ever, however.

"It's not," you shrugged. _Maybe this was his way of refusing..._

"So it'll be..." his eyebrow raised to his hairline, "...just us?" 

You nodded, rapidly losing hope. "Severus it's alright if—"

" _I'll attend._ " 

You looked up in surprise and saw that shine ever present in his eyes. _What in Merlin’s name was it?!_

"Wonderful," you cleared your throat, steadying your voice, "I trust you'll be able to travel to my residence with the floo network."

He nodded.

“I shall see you on Christmas Day, then, Severus." 

You almost ran out of his office. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Will I go back to the regular update schedule? Who knows, at this point. 
> 
> But hey, many of you were like "if you're done with the next one then upload now!!" to which I at first responded with "but CONSISTENCY" 
> 
> now I'm just throwing in chapters left and right. Cause I'm just as impatient to update as you are.


	11. Christmas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My exam today is cancelled, hurrah! Though I probably still shouldn't sleep at 4 AM (yea it's 4 AM). Told you I'm a disaster. 
> 
> I couldn't hold back this chapter, I'm sure you're pleased to see that it turned out to be about 3.5K words... among other things.
> 
> Thank you MiscreantBrat, Cherry_Popsicle, pollinger, LightOwl1505, Romancelover38, Metrasol, Yuuchan_Hrabia, Sac1i, Damn_it_Derek_Hale, Endermei, EliDeetz, and Ayushi for leaving comments in the last chapter! AND OVER 150 KUDOS I AM STOKED AAAAAA 
> 
> In reply to Ayushi, just in case you didn't see my reply and to any of you who might need this info: 
> 
> My update schedule is supposed to be on weekends. Either Friday, Saturday, or Sunday. Depends on whether I feel inspired to write or not. Right now it's just slightly off cause I keep writing under stress to calm myself down. I mean, I could just save it for later but my impatience doesn't agree. 
> 
> This fic has a tumblr [palatefor-strangeremedies](https://palatefor-strangeremedies.tumblr.com) where I draw Severus and post memes of my own fic, because I do that. If you want to follow me on instagram it's @glacier.llane
> 
> Enjoy!

You ploughed through your shopping list throughout the week. 

It was exciting, actually, you've never planned something like this in your house before. You supposed your own focus on work, coupled with a bit of reclusiveness was the reason for it. 

You decided on hints of green to decorate your residence, despite Gilderoy's insistence that you should put lilac somewhere in there. Slytherin was something you and Severus had in common, so why not welcome the head of Slytherin himself with the house colours? 

Food wasn't a problem. Since you lived alone, you knew how to cook yourself a decent meal. It wasn't anything too fancy, but good enough for a...

Date?

Oh dear... It is a date, isn't it? 

You cleared your throat as you ducked into Diagon Alley for the tenth time that week. Your shopping list was done at this point, you've actually bought a tree and the old witch selling it insisted you take a complimentary bag of mistletoe. Needless to say, you set the bag aside, trying not to think of what it would entail.

All that was left was finding him a gift.

(You wonder if he still uses that quill you gave him on his birthday.)

Passing by Twilfitt and Tattings, you were greeted by someone you did not expect. 

"(f/n)!" 

"Cissa!" 

You traded cheek-to-cheek kisses and small distanced hugs. It felt a bit awkward. Perhaps it has been too long since you've greeted family. 

"You're out and about," she held you at arm's length and observed your outfit. You suddenly felt a bit self-conscious.

Your entire wardrobe was nice— you were a Black, after all, but Cissa was always so fashionable. 

"Yes, Christmas shopping, you know," you dismissed. 

"Ah, likewise," she took her hand from your shoulder, "how are things with the Ministry? I heard from Lucius of what happened." 

"I don't know, Cissa, they still suspect me despite everything." 

"Maybe Lucius could help?" 

"Maybe..." You really didn't think so. If anything, Lucius will be a hindrance. "Speaking of, where is he?" . 

"In Twilfitt and Tattings, he doesn't like me picking out his Christmas robes too much," she wrinkled her nose in mild annoyance, "what of you? Getting anything special?" 

"I need a gift for someone, actually,"you avoided her eyes lest she suspects—

Cissa had a smile that reminded you of when you were children. 

Well, the vigilance of a Black is not to be doubted. 

"Are we going to hear wedding bells soon?" She whispered animatedly. 

_Sigh._

"I'm not sure, Cissa..." you've been discovered, might as well make use of it, "he's a bit... distanced. That's why I'm having a hard time deciding on a gift." 

"I usually get Lucius cufflinks, or perhaps a cologne I like..." Cissa held her chin in thought, "...maybe a walking stick?" 

You inwardly groaned, suddenly reminded that Severus was not of your class. What would your father say if he found out— well, there was nothing to find... Yet. 

"Maybe get a nice bottle of wine to loosen him up?" Cissa winked at you. 

"Bugger off, Cissa," you waved her hand away and shared a giggle.

Though, a bottle of wine didn't sound too bad. You were sure he needed it after dealing with that many students. 

You voiced your approval and Cissa led you to her "preferred store". It was around the back of the alley, and upon entry you were greeted by walls and walls of liquor.

"Do you know his preference?" Cissa asked as you inspected the stores of wine.

"No?" 

"Then give us the best one you have," she said to the shopkeeper. 

The keeper perused the shelves and pulled out a sleek bottle with a deep red tint.

"Aged Dragon's Blood Grenache," the shopkeeper said, "imported from France."

"Oh, I've had that one. A marvellous choice," Cissa along with the shopkeeper, proceeded to explain the notes and flavours of the wine. The keeper said they'd offer you to taste it but it was the last bottle on the shelf.

One of the notes they mentioned was blood orange. If you thought about it, the blood aspects matched his aesthetic of a bat. You almost laughed. 

"I'll take it."

.

.

"Cissa could you not tell anyone about... this?" You pleaded as she gushed about the gift.

"Alright, my lips are sealed. Though if I'm not the first person to be notified when a wedding happens..." she squeezed your shoulder, "... I'll kill you." 

The assuredness in her eyes gave you a feeling she just might. 

It's fortunate that she won't ever hear of a wedding. 

* * *

Your nervousness peaked on Christmas Eve.

Looking around your house, you made sure everything was in immaculate condition. You considered that you did a pretty good job of decorating, though the bag of mistletoe was still left untouched.

It would be cheap, you thought, to steal a kiss just because of a strange plant. 

Perhaps you'll hang one. Just one.

And somewhere unlikely for the two of you to be standing under. 

* * *

Christmas morning brought you a surprising calm. You supposed that all the nervousness had passed and now you were left with only excitement.

You went through your closet and chose an outfit for later. It was something elegant but not too formal, and quite comfortable— you feared that you'd appear too stiff in something too strict. 

You set the dining table and prepared the food, a standard Christmas Dinner platter, and for the wine, you picked out something light, just in case he opts to open his present and sample it. 

Making sure everything was ready, you checked the hour and decided you had time to answer any cards on your desk if there were any. You cleaned up, changed into your outfit and proceeded to your study. 

There were a few cards on your table, one was the usual card they sent every healer that works at St Mungo's. It was lime green like your old uniform and inside was an animated picture of Mungo Bonham wishing you a happy holiday.

Another was from your parents, apologising that they couldn't send a gift, in fear of the ministry suspecting anything. 

Another one was lilac with shimmering dust all over, and you knew immediately who it was from. Inside was a drawing of Severus in a bright sweater. You laughed.

The last one... Was an odd sort of thing. It was clearly strewn together with spare parchment. You opened it and saw a crude drawing of you and Severus... under the mistletoe? 

Sure enough, when you flipped it over, it was from Remus. 

_Honestly, that man..._

You were finishing your replies to everyone when the fireplace crackled into green flames. Glancing to your clock, you realised he was right on time. 

He majestically stepped out of the fire and looked around the room until his eyes landed on you. 

You forgot how to breathe as you took in his outfit.

His hair was combed, one side neatly tucked behind his ear and he was wearing the best of his robes, a deep green cravat around his neck, and replacing his cape was a pitch black overcoat with green lining on the inside.

He matched your decor. 

And by extent, he matched you. 

He seemed to notice this as his eyes travelled over your form. He didn't even try to hold back his smirk. 

"Happy Christmas, Severus... If you don't mind..." You cleared your throat, "I have to get these delivered first. I'll be back in a minute." You took the cards and left him in your study. 

It wasn't quite the proper etiquette to leave your guest but you needed to take a breath after he stole it away like that. How in Merlin's name would you survive the rest of the dinner? It hasn't even started! 

You steadied your pace and walked outside to your mailbox to send all the cards. A post owl arrived just before you went back inside. 

Bracing yourself, you opened the study door and saw him perusing your books. 

You closed the door behind you and approached him as he took out a textbook from one of the shelves. 

"Muggle books?" He held up the book with an eyebrow raised. 

"Despite their odd practices, there is always something to be learnt from them," you shrugged. He seemed ever so pleased by your answer and continued browsing your shelves, his fingers almost caressing the spines. 

Well, Severus loves books, it was no secret. 

You leaned on your desk and watched him pull another one out and briefly flipped through it. 

You could do this all day, honestly, watching him so pleased with all your books, but the day's events haven't even started. 

"Severus?" 

"Hm?" He didn't even look up from the book. 

"Would you like a tour of my house?" 

He perked up and you saw that light in his eyes— were you imagining it or was it getting brighter? 

Nodding, he set the book back in its place and approached you. 

_ Merlin, he's exceptionally handsome right then...  _

He perched beside you by the desk and you realised you were standing quite close. You could almost lean up and kiss him— He waved his hand to the door, signalling for you to lead the way. 

You gulped and reluctantly tore your eyes away from him. 

.

.

He followed you closely as you showed him the rest of the house. Severus took ample time not just to admire the furnishings, you caught him staring at you a few times and your hands brushed as he stood a little too close. Heat rose up your neck and reached your ears. 

You admit your outfit was quite nice, so it's only natural that he's admiring it... but there was no reason for him to be standing so close. 

You passed your bedroom and he furrowed his eyebrows at the painting beside the door. You had forgotten you even had it. 

It was a picture of three ravens on a branch, much like the Black family crest, and they were staring at Severus intently. 

"It should caw in the event of an intruder," you remembered. 

"If I strolled in right now, would it consider me an intruder?"

"Severus, please, dinner first," you find yourself going back to the habit of teasing him. 

He pursed his lips as he caught your meaning, a faint blush creeping up to his cheeks. He stole a glance at you and you swear that fire was getting brighter by the minute. You had a strange feeling he was scheming something... what could it possibly be?

"Speaking of which, are you hungry yet?" You brushed off the feeling in your chest. 

He nodded silently and you led the way to the dining room.

.

.

Dinner was probably the least awkward of events. He politely enjoyed the meal and you fell into a comfortable silence. 

Of course, you couldn't avoid looking at him from time to time... he looked gorgeous in that get-up. The fact that it matched your house decor made you feel like he belonged here.

.

.

After dinner, you led him to your living room and he inspected the tree you decorated. You picked up the tall box underneath it and handed it to him. 

He raised an eyebrow at it.

"Don't shake it, it's fragile," you warned. He held the string holding the wrapping and looked at you for approval. "Go ahead." 

He unwrapped the gift and inspected it. You knew it was clearly expensive. He turned it in his hands and opened the lid to view the bottle inside. 

He glanced at you and you saw that light shining brighter than ever... 

This was it... he was about to deploy his plan... 

"Perhaps we could talk? Over this?" You could see that he had to work up the courage to say it as he pulled the bottle out of the box. 

What could he possibly want to speak about? And with that serious expression about his face... perhaps he's about to end it all— ridiculous, there was nothing to end, was there?

Well, there was a year of a friendship that consisted of teasing and odd work companionship... perhaps you were too forward in expecting more from him. 

You did want more, you finally admitted. It was ringing inside your brain as you faced his intent stare. 

And perhaps... he wasn't ready to let go of his bitterness. 

You sighed, knowing you'll soon find out. 

"Sure," you replied, "I shall fetch the glasses." 

.

.

As he usually does, he let your nervousness rise as the took the longest time to pour himself a drink instead of immediately getting to the point. You crossed your legs in your seat and sipped your glass as he sat himself down opposite you. 

"I've had a... lovely evening," 

Well, that's not a bad start. You still fear he's lulling you into a false sense of security. 

"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself." 

"Quite. However..." 

Here it goes—

"...I know I've asked you this before... What are your intentions?" 

"I haven't said it explicitly, but I figured you knew... at least a little bit," you fingered the rim of your glass as you stared down the blood-red liquid. 

"Oh, I've noticed. Mostly the effect I have on you... and the flirting," he cleared his throat nervously. 

Flirting? So what you've been doing _was_ flirting? 

"...so much so that I question its sincerity. I'm afraid I've come to some sort of ploy—" 

You huffed and stood up, walking to a cabinet by the edge of the room. 

Why must he think everything was a ploy against him? 

Well, now that you've thought of it... perhaps he too wonders why a noble Black would desire a meagre half-blood such as himself. 

You turned to face him and was shocked to find him standing there behind you. The man had silent footsteps, it seemed. 

"However, if you are truly sincere..." he slowly walked towards you, and you get the feeling he was prowling like some sort of animal trying to catch its prey. "...I must ask you something else." He backed you into the cabinet until your backside was against the edge of it. 

He was like a snake. Truly the head of Slytherin. 

And as one, he wouldn't stop until he gets what he wants. 

You almost let out a squeak as you saw his hand rest on the top of the cabinet beside your hip. You were trapped between him and the furniture. 

Staring into his eyes so close like this... you could see much in them. There was curiosity, some sort of doubt, cautiousness, and... hope? 

Perhaps... you shouldn't name that fire in his eyes. 

He tried to tug at your mind but you gave him a reproachful look. 

"Then I ask you why..." He asked instead, "Why, (f/n)?" 

You didn't know how to answer, mostly because you didn't know the answer yourself. 

"I'm a half-blood with nothing but a tainted past on my hands..." 

"I..." you didn't know how you found your voice, "I don't know. You'll see that I find it all so confusing... you baffle me, Severus." 

It was the truth. You figured honesty was at play at the moment.

He searched your eyes and you were sure he was about to try legilimency on you again until he spoke, "...you'll be pleased to hear that the opposite happens more often than you might think."

_You baffle him?_

"Really?"

"I didn't think I'd be foolish enough to be lured into the Heiress of Black's games." He was smirking as you pursed your lips at the title. 

"It was, Severus. Now I'm not quite sure," you almost whispered. His face was so close that your noses almost touched. "...I was under the impression that my affections are unwelcome to you." 

You gazed into his dark eyes and desired to trace the hard lines of his handsome face with your fingertips. 

You realised you were about to do just that as he grabbed your hand mid-air.

A surge of panic rushed through you as you realised you may have stepped over some sort of boundary. The apology was on the tip of your tongue and—

You felt his thumb caress your palm. 

"It's not." He muttered. 

_Could it be? Could Severus…_

You almost saw the walls fall apart in his eyes but he closed them and drew in a deep breath as he leaned down and brushed your lips with his own. Though it was so very brief, you felt yourself go lightheaded. His lips moved to your cheek instead and gave a chaste peck, much like the one you gave him a while ago. 

_Such a tease._

"It's only fair," he had mirth in his voice and you realised he just read your thoughts.

"How so?" It was incredible you even had the strength to speak at this point. Your mind has given up on making sense of everything and you figured you might as well just enjoy the moment.

"You tease me all the time..." his breath was on your ear and you shuddered. He huffed a laugh and repositioned his hand to intertwine your fingers. 

Your doubts of Severus being affectionate had just been disproved. 

He was... romantic. 

_and delightfully so._

The feeling in your gut has melded into every inch of your insides at this point. 

He pulled back and you instantly missed his warmth.

"...I have something for you." He averted his eyes. Your hands were still intertwined but he didn't address it. It seemed that since he got his answers, he was back to his usual timidness. 

He used his other hand to fetch a small rectangular box from the inner pocket of his coat. 

You took it from him and reluctantly pulled your hand away as you moved to open it.

"Merry Christmas," he muttered as you took out the silvery object from the case. 

"A scalpel?" You smiled as you twirled it in your hands.

"It's not much—" 

You saw the engraving on the handle. It was your name. 

"It's wonderful, Severus. Thank you," you inspected the blade edge and placed it back in its case. You walked to the coffee table, setting the gift down. 

Turning back to inspect him, you saw him shift the weight on his feet as he stood there awkwardly. 

"What happens now?" He said almost in a whisper. 

"I don't know, Severus. You decide," you approached him and braved yourself to take his hand. He responded immediately, running his thumb over your knuckles. You still needed to get used to that. All the more reasons to hold his hand…

He tipped your chin up to look at him and said, "It's already too much but may I... ask something of you, (f/n)?" He was even more serious than you've ever seen him.

You nodded. 

"If the time comes that I must... _leave_... please, don't follow me," he squeezed your hand.

You knew what he was referring to. You slid your other hand over his forearm, just along his mark. His eyes displayed a brief expression of grief before he looked to the side. 

"I know, Severus..." you moved your hand up and cupped his face. 

You never expected it to last a lifetime. You didn’t even expect it would start…

"It baffles me that I..." he still refused to look at you, "...I have no desire to back down.” He looked into your eyes, the light, still masked by cautiousness, was slowly returning.

"Likewise," you muttered, "perhaps, then... we should just enjoy the time we have."

He sighed, leaning down to touch your foreheads. You closed your eyes and basked in the intimacy. 

"How ironic, since I have to leave soon." He muttered. 

"Must you?" 

He hummed in reply and pulled away. Still holding your hand, he approached the fireplace. You fetched him his gift and he stood before the fire to inspect you, as if assessing the gravity of what just happened. 

You were pleased to see his lips turn up to a smirk.

“I’ll…” his eyes flickered to the side, “…see you on New Year’s Eve.” 

You couldn’t hold back your smile. 

“I’ll see you, darling,” you let the nickname slip and leaned up to peck him on the cheek. He growled at the name but a blush tinted his cheeks. 

He stared at you intently and squeezed your hand one last time before backing away into green flames. 

_Sigh_. What a night.  You pinched yourself to make sure you weren’t dreaming. 

You flopped down your armchair as you processed what just happened, the smile still present on your face. You don’t remember the last time you felt this elated. 

As you looked up, you noticed the mistletoe hanging from the wall above the cabinet. 

 

_You kissed under a mistletoe… without even knowing it._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it happened. I am sleep deprived, and it happened.
> 
> EliDeetz did an illustration of Severus from this chapter and I can't get over it. GO LOOK AT IT AND GIVE HER SOME LOVE [[link]](https://nobodys-baby-now.tumblr.com/post/185647224342/date-night-inspired-by-palatefor-strangeremedies)


	12. The Eve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I think I'm going back to weekend updates, I unfortunately have to rest my brain after cramming for exams. As much as I so so love spoiling you with all the sporadic updates, I am only human (allegedly).
> 
> Also you may have noticed that this will be 20 chapters now. Idk, it's just getting longer by the chapter. 
> 
> Thank you MiscreantBrat, Grounded_Pepper, Romancelover38, Sac1i, Wingspan2050, LightOwl1505, Yuuchan_Hrabia, A Big Fan, ClusterxAmaryllis, EliDeetz, Nomorestoriesfriends, Cherry_Popsicle, Metrasol, Damn_it_Derek_Hale, Silverwolfwarrior13, and AyushiSushi for leaving such wonderful comments on the last chapter! I swear I cry every time with every comment. Also I plan to reply to some of those I just haven't thought of what to say yet.
> 
> Enjoy!

"It's miserable," Severus complained as he stirred the aconite mixture half-heartedly.

"What is?"

"Spending the Eve like this," he hissed and stabbed the spoon into the concoction as you sliced the last bits of Aconite.

(He had tried to hide a smile as he saw you use the scalpel he gave you.)

You knew he was attempting to be more open to you, but his idea of it was by... venting the complaints of his life as a teacher. 

You didn't really mind... Earlier, you had expected an awkward greeting by the door, but he quickly fell into grumbling about how he caught students wandering on Christmas after he returned from your house, and stressed that that was the reason he needed to leave, muttering under his breath of how children didn't regard their own safety despite current situations. 

It was positively adorable. 

You couldn't help but hold his hand and peck his cheek as you praised his responsibility as head of house. He turned a shade of crimson and dismissed your advances but still held onto your hand all the while.

Severus seemed to have an affinity for the touch. You didn't mind that at all. 

Now, however, he was almost whining like a petulant child. 

Well, it was _still_ cute...

"We're almost done, Severus," you chuckled and grabbed the ladle from him, purposefully lingering on his hand. "We'll still have about an hour to ourselves before midnight." 

He stood aside and let you take over, but not before you saw his smirk at your attempt to nonchalantly brush hands. It brought a strange fluttering to your chest. 

"While I finish up, why don't you fetch us a drink? Perhaps the Grenache from last week?" 

He pursed his lips in thought before nodding and went to his drink stores. 

.

.

"What's this?" 

"A cocktail." He didn't elaborate further and left as he walked to his seat by the fire. 

"You... made this?" 

He hummed an answer and sipped his own drink as he stared at the fire. 

Severus can mix cocktails? What an obscure yet intriguing discovery… You supposed it was no different than potion-making.

A sip and you found it light on your tongue. 

"I hope you don't mind the taste, I don't desire a repeat of last year..." 

He's still on about that? Well, he just indirectly admitted he wanted you to stay longer...

_Come to think of it..._ your eyes widened in realisation. 

"I wasn't sick just then," you sat in the chair opposite him. He gave you a raised eyebrow in disbelief. "I think... that was when it all started." 

"Hm?" 

"My fondness for you," you took another sip and set the glass down on the table between the two of you. 

"Your fondness..." he repeated to himself as if to manifest it. Severus seemed to still be baffled by it all. You reached across the gap to take his hand. He sighed and happily received it. 

The minutes passed and just as you were getting drowsy, an owl burst through the room, landing on the table. You took the letter from its beak and it almost screeched at Severus. 

"Merlot," you scolded, moving your hand in front of the owl. Severus retracted his hand to prevent from being pecked. Merlot backed away and flew to perch on the backrest of your chair. 

"Is this..." It was almost comical how Severus was staring at Merlot just as cautiously, "... your parents' owl?" 

You nodded and tore open the wax crest. 

"How fitting," Severus muttered. 

You looked up and saw a brief flash of... discouragement? 

"Severus," you discarded the letter on the table and rose to approach him. He refused to meet your eyes and instead stood to stare out the window. 

"I don't understand, (f/n)..." 

"Neither do I, Severus. I've given up on trying to... if two brilliant minds such as ours could not, then perhaps..." You went beside him and took his arm, "...it's not meant to be understood?"

"How poetic of you," he teased, the smirk returning to his face. 

"It's your fault, darling," you rested your head on his shoulder, suppressing a yawn. He placed his hand over yours on his arm.

"You'll just... give up your family values?" 

_For him?_

He didn't say it but you could feel it in his voice. 

"What's there to give up if I hadn't quite had them in the first place?" 

You tried, you really did. It just never sat quite right with you. Especially not in your field of work.

"To be fair," you said into his shoulder, "there are many other things they could dig up to disown me." 

Severus let out an amused hum and you felt his nose in your hair. 

You noted how comfortable it felt, being with him. It made you question why you denied it for so long... well, you knew why. 

Flecks of light streamed through the window as fireworks sparks sank into the lake. The clock chimed, signalling the new year. 

"Would it be commonplace of me to bestow a kiss?" Severus asked almost too quietly. You chuckled and squeezed his arm.

"I won't oblige you if you don't want to."

"But I do," he spoke, even quieter than before. 

Surely he felt the rapid beating of your pulse. 

"Then, by all means, Severus." 

He pulled away to face you and slowly cupped your face with his bony hands. You placed your own hands over his and he leaned down— 

His eyes flickered upwards. 

"It's staring at us,"

You turned your head and saw Merlot still perched on the chair, watching like... well, like an owl. 

"You're afraid he'll tattle?" You chuckled. 

"It's just unnerving." 

"I don't think he's leaving until I write a reply." 

Severus groaned. You couldn't help but giggle. 

"You wouldn't happen to have some owl treats would you?" 

"I have rats," he reluctantly pulled away to walk to his shelves, "or mice." 

"That's more of a whole meal, Severus," you saw Merlot's head turn to follow Severus as he opened a jar of dead mice. He held the rodent by its tail and Merlot immediately swooped to get it. 

You heard Severus curse and let go of the tail. He watched as the bird flew away with the mice and wiped his hands. You silently approached him and wound your arm around his middle, "Now where were we?" 

Severus gave the slightest gasp and hid his blush behind his curtain of hair as he placed down the cloth he wiped his hands with. You reached up and tucked his locks behind his ear. He hissed, turning a darker shade of red. 

Severus should wear his hair like this more often. 

The blush was beginning to reach his ears so he moved your hand to place it on his chest. You felt his pulse match your own as he finally leaned down to kiss you.

It was more of a kiss than the brief brush on Christmas, but still so very chaste.

You longed for just a little bit more... Your hand slowly moved to his nape and you pulled him down for another kiss. 

This time you could taste the brandy on his lips.

That's more like it... 

He moved to hide his face in your hair as his hands awkwardly shifted to your waist to hold you in an embrace. 

"Happy New Year, (f/n)," he muttered. 

"Happy New Year, Sev," you buried your face in his shoulder. He squeezed your hip and sighed into your hair.

.

.

"It's just down the hall, Severus, I can manage," 

"Says the one who's falling asleep on me," he had his hand around your waist as he guided you to your door. As if to prove his point, a yawn came to you and you leaned into his shoulder. 

He opened your door and you unwillingly pushed off him to enter your quarters. 

"Come in?” You turned and leaned on the doorframe. 

You saw something flicker in his eyes but it was gone as soon as it came. 

"I'd better not..." he leaned down and gave you a peck on the lips, "...good night, (f/n)."

You watched him walk back to his door. He turned to look at you briefly before entering his door. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am rolling in all the fluff and enjoying it.


	13. Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I apologise for this being really late. A lot of shit happened, but mainly I just wasn't feeling inspired. Actually still not feelin it right now but I hope you like this chapter nonetheless! We're still in fluffy territory! I hope you won't get sick from all this fluff. hehe
> 
> Thank you to Grounded_Pepper, LightOwl1505, Yuuchan_Hrabia, MiscreantBrat, honestlyrachel, EliDeetz, ClusterxAmaryllis, Romancelover38, Endermei, Sac1i, AyushiSushi, Cherry_Popsicle, Damn_it_Derek_Hale, Silverwolfwarrior13, and Emily for leaving comments on the last chapter! and 200+ KUDOS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 
> 
> Also EliDeetz did an illustration of Christmas Severus I can't get over it!!!! go check it out -> [link](https://nobodys-baby-now.tumblr.com/post/185647224342/date-night-inspired-by-palatefor-strangeremedies)
> 
> Enjoy!

_Knock knock knock knock._

You turned in your bed and covered yourself with the blankets. 

_Knock knock knock knock._

It must be Severus… what does he want this early in the morning? You turned again and peeked to confirm that it was still dim in the room. Well, it's not like the lake usually emitted much light, but...

_Knock knock knock knock._

_Sigh._

The fact that it woke you up meant that he’s been at it for some time, too. You sluggishly got out of bed, combing your fingers through your hair as you went in the bathroom. 

If he was willing to wait that long, then he can handle a few more minutes for you to freshen up. 

The rapping on your door sounded again and you yawned as you made your way to open it, presenting your best annoyed face. 

Sure enough, Severus was standing there with an all-too-smug smirk.

“Did I wake you?” He asked, an unusual amount of cheek in his voice.

“What do you think, Severus?” You grumbled at him. His smirk widened and you weren’t sure if you wanted to slam the door or kiss it away. 

“You left these,” he handed you the letter from your parents and your scalpel. You stared at him incredulously. You could just as easily grab these items later...

You took them and was about to close the door when he held it with his hand. 

“May I…?” His usual timidness returning, “I’ve… arranged for breakfast.” His eyes flickered to the side and your annoyance soon dissipated, the fluttering in your stomach taking its place.

He wants to have breakfast with you? Why didn't he just say so? 

Severus and his complicated schemes...

“Come in then,” you muttered, a smile threatening to grace your lips and break your annoyed façade. You closed the door behind him and placed the letter on the table to read later before storing the scalpel in its place. 

A crack was heard just as you just missed the house elf from the breakfast table. Severus sat, already sipping his coffee— black as his robes, and picked up the Daily Prophet. You sat across him and picked a pastry from the selection on the table.

Your brain tried to rack up an occasion for him to want to have breakfast with you like this… but there doesn't seem to be any. You might even say that he just likes spending time with you— 

Perhaps so, if the past two holidays were of any indication. You could get used to mornings like this one. 

To top it all off, that look of content fits _so handsomely_ on his face. 

"Something a matter?" He looked up from his paper at you. 

"I was just..." You realised since you were now together— _oh Merlin_ , there was really no reason for excuses, "...admiring you." 

He blinked and let out a "hmph" before looking back down to his paper. A blush crept up to his cheeks and you could tell he wasn't really reading as his eyes were just focused at one spot, which was the corner of the page. 

You couldn't hold back your smile and leaned against your hand on the table to purposely take a closer gander at him. He hissed and looked further down so his hair would fall to cover his face, which was no doubt flushed red. 

"I can't help myself, Severus," you teased, finding your smile widening. He grumbled and raised the paper over his face. 

It appears the development of your relationship has not dulled your ability to fluster him... In fact, it might have honed it. 

You smiled to yourself and decided to have mercy on him, finally biting into your food.

.

.

**(f/n),**

**Perhaps the new year brings us fortune! The ministry has informed us that they will halt their visits. I'm sure they will benefit from spending their resources elsewhere. I hope they have decided to leave you be as well.**

**In any case, Happy New Year, dearest! May the Black family name prosper.**

You've never been so happy reading a family letter. Severus noticed this and raised an eyebrow at you. 

You could only hope that the news was true and made a note to check your house for any letters later. 

.

.

You were just finishing your plate when another knock was at your door. 

Now, who could that be? 

You got up and answered it to find Madam Pomfrey standing outside. 

“Good morning, (f/n),” she greeted, “I just came to inform you that there will be a staff meeting in an hour and you’re invited.” 

“I’ll be there,” you said. 

“And have you seen Severus? I’m supposed to inform him as well but he doesn’t seem to be home…” she trailed off, glancing at Severus’s door. 

Oh, you’ve seen him alright... He's perched by your breakfast table reading the morning paper. 

_The implications she'll conclude if she finds out!_

"I haven't," you replied, "but I'll be sure to inform him if I do." 

"Would you please? Thank you, (f/n)."

"No problem, Madam," you smiled politely, "have a good day." She bid you a good day in return and left. 

“She said something about a meeting?” Severus asked as you walked to the table. He was hiding a smirk behind his sip of coffee. 

“Yes, in an hour,” you replied, “I should probably get ready.” You went to his side and bent down to kiss his hair. "You go ahead..." 

He looked up at you questioningly before realising why. 

"Quite right," he finished his coffee as he stood up and you saw him out. He stopped by the doorway and leaned down to give you a kiss. You could faintly taste the bitter coffee on his lips. 

.

.

.

You emerged from the fireplace and all heads immediately turned to you. Professor Flitwick looked taken aback that you were here, most likely because he only heard of your stay and never expected to actually meet you, Professor Sprout gave a sort of cautiously held back smile, while McGonagall gave a curt nod. 

The only one who dared to approach you was Remus. 

“Good morning, (f/n),” he greeted just as Severus entered the room. 

_Such perfect timing._

You saw Severus halt his steps just a few ways behind Remus and fix his stare at him. 

“Good morning,” you said to Remus, giving Severus a glance over his shoulder, “Happy New Year, Remus.” 

“Happy New Year, (f/n),” he replied with a smile, “I’m glad you got my Christmas card, by the way.” 

Severus raised both eyebrows at you and gave a squint to the back of Remus’s head. You returned an incredulous expression his way. 

Remus was confused for a second until he turned his head to follow your gaze and caught Severus sitting down to mask himself. 

“So… I'm guessing it happened?" Remus leaned in to whisper. 

“What do you mean?" Your eyes widened and you felt warmth slowly come to your face. 

"It did!" Remus’s eyes lit up and he broke into a laugh. 

"Shut it, Remus! Nothing happened!" You hissed and smacked him across the chest. Remus laughed even louder. You shushed him and saw Professors McGonagall and Sprout turn towards the commotion. 

You'd bet all your inheritance that they thought Remus was flirting. Which meant that a certain head of Slytherin did too... 

You saw him sit facing away from you with his hands discreetly clenched under the table. 

"He's pouting," Remus nudged you with his elbow. 

"And I’m supposed to do something?" You waved him off.

"I don't know, sit next to him maybe? Meeting's about to start," Remus shrugged, his grin still wide. You sighed and made your way to the table as more people came in the room. 

Pulling the chair next to Severus, you gave Remus a look and he smiled in approval. 

"Severus," you greeted. 

"(f/n)," he nodded, not even looking at you. 

Remus sat across from you and pretended to mind his own business as everyone else took their seats. Soon, the table was full and the headmaster arrived to sit at the head. You tuned out his polite greetings and took a glance at Severus. 

His expression was almost unreadable, save for the slight crease between his eyebrows. His hands were still clenched on his lap and his shoulders were tense. He glanced at you and the look of content from earlier in the morning was nowhere to be found. 

_After all your gestures of affecti_ o _n, Severus still doubts where it lies?_

Everyone turned to Remus as Dumbledore asked him of his classes and you saw a frown grace Severus's lips. 

_...Maybe he just hates Remus's guts._

You dared yourself to reach for Severus's hand under the table. The tip of your finger barely touched the back of his hand when he suddenly turned it and grabbed your hand to intertwine your fingers. A small gasp escaped your lips and you found him holding back a smirk as he glanced at you. 

Though the scornful expression returned the second he looked back at Remus. 

_You supposed the latter theory was correct._

Severus relaxed his shoulders a bit and you felt his thumb graze your hand before he released it to clasp his hands on the table. You saw this stance before, he used it on the previous Defence teacher… 

Remus seemed to brace himself for what Severus was about to say and you saw Dumbledore hold a patient gaze. 

You realised your hand was on his thigh and an idea came to you.

Perhaps you could prevent him from being too menacing…

You moved your hand down to his knee— _not the other way, no_ , in an almost caress.

Severus was in the middle of a sentence when he almost, _almost_ lost his composure. You caught the subtle change in his breath and the fluttering of his eyelids as he struggled to keep his tone even.

Severus gave you a questioning glance when he finished speaking and you returned a warning stare as you squeezed his knee.

He visibly gulped. 

Severus halted his menace the rest of the meeting and was content to let your hand rest on his knee, occasionally covering it with his own. You were thankful that the one next to you was Professor Binns, who couldn’t care less about what was happening if he ever saw it. 

Dumbledore had asked he progression of the Wolfsbane potion and that was about the extent of your speech. You wondered why he even bothered inviting you. 

Severus finally moved your hand away as people were standing up to leave. You decided you’d take your leave as well. 

“I’ll see you later, Severus,” you stood up and pat him on the shoulder, not realising that you left him in a staring match with Remus. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok just a disclaimer i might edit things once I feel inspired because i'm petty like that. But it won't change the base of the chapter, I already have everything planned, i swear—


	14. Birthdays

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Early update? In MY fanfic? It's more likely than you think. 
> 
> Well, inspiration is here to HOPEFULLY stay. The main thing is I don't feel so dead inside anymore! Also, I realise I don't hate the last chapter as much as I thought I did. (It could be better, but eh, I'll fix it when I have the energy to) 
> 
> Your always lovely comments helped boost my faith in the last chapter! Speaking of, thank you to cloudywishes, A Big Fan, Yuuchan_Hrabia, MiscreantBrat, Romancelover38, EliDeetz, Sac1i, Yuki_S20, AyushiSushi, and Cherry_Popsicle for leaving comments on the last chapter! And of course, thank you to everyone who left kudos and/or set a bookmark! I can't say enough that feedback means a lot to me. 
> 
> Also bear with me, still in fluffy territory. I promise other things will happen soon. I just see a gap in the calendar for PoA and my brain immediately goes FLUFF. This, THIS is why this fic is now 20 chapters instead of 10 like my original plan. 
> 
> Enjoy!

“You seem pensive, (f/n),” Remus said over his goblet of Wolfsbane.

“Just thinking,” you muttered, still in thought. 

“About Severus?”

You turned your attention to him and his wide grin. Remus seemed to be the number one advocate for you and Severus to hit it off… 

Maybe he deserves to know… just a little bit. 

“Actually it is partly about Severus,” your hand went to your neck in a show of nervousness. 

“Oh?” Remus’s grin extended ear to ear. 

“Yes, his birthday is coming soon and I haven’t the slightest idea of what to give him…” 

“(f/n), that’s _all about Severus_ ,” he chuckled all too happily, “I can’t help you in that regard, though. Perhaps you should just directly ask him?” 

.

.

"Severus, what would you like for your birthday?" 

He looked up from his potion work and saw you wiping down your scalpel. 

"I don't require anything," he muttered dismissively and moved to put his ingredients in the cauldron. 

"But I insist, Severus," you said nonchalantly, fingering the engraving on the handle before putting the scalpel down. Looking up, you saw him look at you as he stirred the cauldron. “What would you like?” You tried again. 

Remus’s suggestion didn’t seem to be working. 

Severus left the cauldron and made his way to you, stopping all so close and almost trapping you between the worktable and himself. _This position seemed familiar…_ You felt his finger tip your chin upwards and you met his piercing eyes. 

“Don’t spoil me, (f/n),” he said threateningly. The menace didn’t faze you and instead made you grin like a fool. 

You do spoil him, don’t you? 

He’d have to expect more of it as long as you’re with him. 

You suppressed a giggle and held his hand against your cheek. He growled but gave into the touch, relinquishing his threat. 

“So?” You tried once more, looking up at him in question. A softness broke through his cold eyes for a moment and you felt his thumb graze your cheek. 

“As I said, I don’t require anything, (f/n),” he retracted his hand and went back to work. 

The absence of his closeness had you stunned for a moment. It made you realise that you were already getting so very attached to him… and judging from that brief show of tenderness in his eyes, he was too. 

You didn’t know what to make of it. The thought filled your insides with an indescribable warmth— 

Perhaps you should just focus on getting him a gift for now. Severus didn’t make it any easier. 

Maybe you required external help once more… 

* * *

"Severus is having a birthday?" Gilderoy sat up in his hospital bed. You chuckled at his enthusiasm and sat on the foot of the bed beside him. "Wait, do we have the same birthdays?"

You glanced at Gilderoy's patient information on the bed frame. 

"No, his is on the ninth, yours is not until the twenty-sixth," you said. 

"Oh, I was hoping to have a party with him… That's what you do with birthdays, right?" 

The mental image of Severus and Gilderoy having a joint birthday party was enough to send you to hysterics. Lilac and black didn't go so well together... 

"What's so funny, (f/n)?"

"Just imagining Severus in a party with bright coloured streamers," you held your middle and wiped a joyful tear away. 

"Well, I suppose he's going to look _really_ jarring. Does he ever wear anything other than black?" Gilderoy tapped his chin in thought. 

Well, he had... _once_... 

_That's it!_

"Gilderoy, thank you so much for your help," you patted his arm as you stood up and he looked at you confused, "I'll be back on your birthday." 

"(f/n), wait!" He called, "Give him this from me?" He flipped through his sketchbook and handed you a drawing of Severus. 

It was inky black and fully animated. The Severus in the portrait crossed his arms and grumbled without sound. 

How does Gilderoy capture his essence so well without even meeting him? 

"I'm sure he'll love it," you smiled. 

Gilderoy gave a tiny cheer. 

* * *

"(f/n)!"

At this rate, you should probably just avoid going near Twilfitt and Tattings altogether… come to think of it, you only shopped here because your parents told you to. You never really gave it a second thought.

"Lucius," you nodded over the racks, hoping he wouldn't— 

He rounded the corner and his walking stick stopped directly in front of your feet. 

Perhaps you should move to Madam Malkin’s Robes for next time…

"I heard the ministry has lifted their watch on you," he spoke with his held high, "you'll find that it's partly due to my efforts." 

You doubted it. But you'll play along so this whole chance meeting will end soon.

“I thank you then," you said without really meaning it, "what brings you here on a work day, Lucius?" You said almost passive-aggressively. It was work hour, Lucius should be away in his ministry business.

"Oh, I just received a letter from Draco, saying that his favoured professor is having a birthday soon," 

_What a coincidence…_

"So I thought I'd stop by and get a pair of cufflinks to gift the man." 

Lucius opened the box he took from under his arm and showed you a pair of white-gold serpent cufflinks.

"It's beautiful, Lucius," you commented, _but Severus would probably never use it._

"Quite," he closed the box and tucked it back under his arm, "what of you? What are you here for?" 

"One of my robes got smeared with some odd substance, so I thought I'd get a replacement." You lied through your teeth. If you so much as hint about you and Severus… Lucius would convey the information to your parents immediately. 

Lucius seemed to buy into your lie and rolled his eyes, clearly having no interest in whatever shenanigan in your profession that might have caused such a thing. He bid you farewell and went to pay for his purchase. 

You waited for him to exit the building before going to the ties and cravats section.

"Looking for something, Ms?" An old shopkeeper with crooked glasses approached you. He smiled politely and waited for you to look over the shelves.

"A gift for my..." You searched the word to describe him. You supposed you’re frequently in his company… "...companion."

Severus would probably shake his head at your use of the word. 

"Any particular colour?" 

"I was thinking green, but something subtle… almost black." 

"Perhaps this one?" He pulled a cravat from the shelf and presented it to you. 

"A little too bright," you commented. The shopkeeper hummed and placed it back. He stepped back and looked up and down the shelves before taking his wand and fetching a box from the top shelf. 

He turned the box to you and you inspected the tie. 

It was black at first glance but the closer you look at it, the subtle yet intricate pattern shone green in the light. 

"Perfect." 

.

.

"Would you take this card, Ms. Black? We offer our services for events such as weddings." 

You fought the urge to groan and politely took it. 

That's the second time someone has mentioned a wedding, and they weren't even your parents... 

"Thank you for your purchase, we hope to see you soon." The woman by the counter winked and you tried not to react as you took the box. 

You were definitely going to Madam Malkin’s next time…

* * *

“So you got him a gift?” Remus sat back in his chair with a mug of tea.

“How could you tell?” You raised an eyebrow at him. It was strange how Remus could read you better than most people. Perhaps due to his predisposition, you didn’t see the need to hold back your gestures. He didn’t have any connection to your family that may endanger your reputation. 

Well, he does have _some_ connection to your family. You’d rather not ponder on it too much, lest you fall to Severus’s almost vengeful concerns. You were enjoying being friends with him— well, that’s another reason to disown you.

“You’re not thinking so much anymore,” he shrugged, “well, what did you get him?” 

“I’m not telling, you,” you smirked. Remus raised both his eyebrows and you’ve never seen so much mischief on his face before. 

“Is it something sexy—“ 

“ _No_ ,” you summoned the potion goblet to your hand and walked to the fireplace, “ _goodbye_ , _Remus_.”

You refused to hear the rest of his sentence and left. 

* * *

“Happy Birthday, Severus,” you presented the box to him and he looked up from his desk with an eyebrow raised. Coincidentally, he was grading papers using the quill you gave him on his last birthday.

You couldn’t help but smile. 

“I thought I said I didn’t require anything,” he slowly stood up from his seat and rounded the desk before reluctantly taking the box. 

“And I said I insist,” you quipped, gesturing for him to open the box. He pursed his lips and did as you told. 

He set the box down on the desk and took the cravat in his hand. You received a questioning look as he saw it shine green in the light. 

“Try it on?” You smirked. He rolled his eyes silently and his hands went to his neck to undo his current cravat. 

You tried your hardest not to visibly ogle him but your self-restraint went away as he roughly pulled the fabric off and exposed his neck. The stirring in your stomach that you’ve gotten used to gave you the urge to kiss him there. 

Severus noticed your lingering stare and cleared his throat as he put on the new cravat. You find yourself almost disappointed and shifted your gaze while biting your lip. 

You’ve admitted that Severus was attractive, but this was a new intensity. 

_Merlin’s thick fluffy white beard…_

He finished tying the cravat and turned to you. You stepped back to inspect him. 

It looked good on him. The green was very subtle and no one could probably make out the pattern unless they looked close enough. 

“You look dashing, Severus,” you went closer and pecked him on the jaw, almost on his neck, “wear it often.”

“Of course,” he muttered quietly, looking away and letting his hair cover his face. 

.

.

“Come with me for a second, Sev?” You pulled him inside as he was escorting you back to your door. “Someone told me to give this to you,” you gave him the inky portrait of himself. 

“Who?” He held it against a light and squinted at it. 

“Gilderoy Lockhart,” you saw the portrait cross its arms and raise an eyebrow at the real Severus. 

“Is there anything I can do to repay him?” Severus said sarcastically. 

An idea suddenly appeared in your head. 

“ _Actually_ , Severus…” 

Both the portrait and the real Severus looked at you threateningly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you spoil him because I love spoiling him   
> Severus deserves the world
> 
> ~~or maybe a certain Ms. Black as his sugar mama~~  
>  I'll see myself out now


	15. Surprises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, looks like we're back to sporadic updates! 
> 
> I don't know, I failed one of my classes and I need to take a repeat exam, hopefully it helps. Send good luck my way! 
> 
> We're nearing the end of this part... I almost don't want it to end... BUT we still have a long long way to go. I want to finish this whole thing before this time next year. Maybe. Hopefully. Then I'll start that other idea I have. It has already been proven that I can't move on from Severus, so... 
> 
> Thank you to MiscreantBrat, Romancelover38, LightOwl1505, ClusterxAmaryllis, p, AyushiSushi, Yuuchan_Hrabia, Pagewolf, Sac1i, blissa, Damn_it_Derek_Hale, and Cherry_Popsicle for leaving comments! Each and every one brightens up my day! (from the keysmashes to the long paragraphs, I LOVE EM ALL)  
> And thank you for all the kudos! 
> 
> Enjoy

You pushed yourself off your office door as you saw him finish signing the guest permit. It was almost past visiting hours but Severus only had his teaching schedule empty at this time. He entered the main lift and you managed to squeeze past the doors before they closed.

You pressed the button for the fourth floor and turned to find his hand on the railing by your waist with him standing close. 

“You know, it’s not the general etiquette to greet a healer like this,” you quipped with a smirk. He didn’t back away and instead raked his eyes over your form, staring oddly at your healer apron. “It’s been awhile, hasn’t it?” 

You haven’t had your apron on for much of your stay at Hogwarts. The white most likely seemed foreign now. 

“Remind me why I’m doing this, again?” Severus said with a sigh. 

He had only begrudgingly come due to your persistent goading. You put the blame on him for giving you the idea in the first place. 

“Call it a favour, if you will,” you shrugged, “I owe you.” 

“Careful, I might just take you up on that,” he said dangerously, his voice close to your ear. You felt a shiver run up your spine. 

“I’m counting on it, Severus,” the lift dinged open and you stepped out, leaving a stunned Severus behind. 

You made your way directly into the ward, your badge giving you access to the door, while Severus went to Miriam Strout to show her his permit. 

Gilderoy was sat on the bed, head hung low as he scribbled into his sketchbook. You heard a sniff and sat on the foot of the bed beside him. 

“What’s wrong, Gilderoy?” 

“(f/n)!” He looked up and tackled you with a hug. You patted his back as soothingly as you could. “I’m glad you’re here!” He sniffed and wiped his tears, “They haven’t visited! and— and it’s—“ 

“Happy Birthday, Gilderoy,” you smiled at him, patting his hand, “I have a surprise for you.” 

“Really?” He exclaimed, the smile already returning to his face. 

As if on cue, Severus entered the ward and walked towards you with a scowl. 

“Severus!” Gilderoy jumped out of bed and ran to tackle Severus with a hug, but was held back by a hand on his shoulder. Gilderoy stepped back and offered a handshake, the smile still on his face. 

Severus looked at you over Gilderoy’s shoulder and you gestured for him to get on with it. He gave you a squint before reluctantly shaking Gilderoy’s hand, not even muttering a Happy Birthday. 

It seemed Gilderoy was satisfied, however, and ran back to his bed to collect his sketching supplies. You went to Severus’s side as he curiously watched Gilderoy excitedly jumping about the bed. 

“Why is he so pleased to see me?” 

“Well, if you haven’t noticed, Severus, some of us enjoy your company,” you teased. He looked at you with a raised eyebrow, processing the backhanded compliment. “Besides, he’s lonely. No one has visited since he’s been admitted here.” 

“What of his family?” Severus asked curiously. 

“I don’t know. They haven’t been easy to contact,” you shrugged. 

.

.

Severus was sat on the chair by the bed and you could see him tuning out Gilderoy’s ramblings. He had barely said a thing, but Gilderoy seemed to be enjoying the extra company all the same. You put a hand on his knee and he looked at you tiredly. 

“Gilderoy, I think we have to leave soon,” you said. 

“Wait, wait,” Gilderoy moved his hand quickly on the sketching paper, “I’m almost done.” 

You squeezed Severus’s knee and he prepared to stand. 

“Here you go!” Gilderoy ripped the paper out of his book and gave it to you. 

It was… you… and Severus. In the position you were in just now. 

You looked up and saw Severus already halfway to the exit. 

“Thank you, Gilderoy,” you stood. 

“No, thank _you_. I had fun today, (f/n),” he smiled. You smiled back before leaving to catch up with Severus. 

.

.

“I suppose you’re keeping that?” Severus peeked over your shoulder at the drawing Gilderoy gave you. 

“Why, would _you_ like to?” You gave him a smirk.

“I worry it would compromise us, should anyone… find it in your possession,” he moved his hands behind his back in the way you knew he was fidgeting. 

“Keep it safe, Severus,” you placed the piece of paper against his chest and he was forced to catch it as you left to return to your office on the ground floor. 

* * *

You woke up from insistent knocking once more. You could understand him waking you up early on a weekday as he had early classes to teach, but it was a nice and quiet Saturday.

“Severus, perhaps you could let yourself in next time,” you opened the door and he had that smug smirk about him again. 

“And deprive myself the joys of disturbing your sleep?”

You stood there beside the door and let your sleepy brain process what he just said. The sentence was insufferable yet sweet at the same time… 

He plopped himself down by the breakfast table and took the Daily Prophet from the house elf that appeared to arrange breakfast. 

.

.

“Perhaps you should have some of my coffee?” 

“Perhaps _you_ shouldn’t have woken me up so early on a Saturday.” You commented and placed your head down on the breakfast table. 

You heard Severus huffed a laugh. 

* * *

Your breakfast routine continued, though he usually left you alone to sleep in on a Sunday. It was soon time to start the potion and Severus showed up on your door with his old Slytherin scarf wrapped around his neck. His expression wasn’t quite happy, however.

“Quidditch?” You asked, “Did Slytherin lose?” 

“Slytherin wasn’t playing,” he gestured with his head to his door. You walked beside him. “However, four Slytherins were caught trying to sabotage the Gryffindor seeker.” 

“They should have planned it better, then,” you said nonchalantly as he opened his door for you. 

“My thoughts exactly,” he quipped. 

.

.

.

.

You were both finishing the night’s work when the fireplace suddenly crackled and through it came Professor McGonagall’s voice. 

“Severus, Ms. Black, to the staff room, now, please.”

You and Severus shared confused looks before stepping into the fire together. 

When you arrived, the room was bustling with worried discussions. You sat yourselves down by the table and Dumbledore called for silence. McGonagall explained the situation, it seemed that Sirius Black has gotten into the castle once more and now managed to enter Gryffindor tower, having all the week’s passwords. To top it all off, Sir Cadogan, the temporary replacement for the Fat Lady, happily let the man in with the right password. 

The room erupted in worried whispers once more and to your surprise, Professor Flitwick chipped in with the idea that someone from the inside has helped him. 

Severus, naturally, turned to Remus. His sentence was halted, however, as Madam Hooch spoke first. 

“Perhaps we should turn to Ms. (f/n) Black—“ 

Brave of her to accuse you in front of everyone like this. You were about to interrupt when you felt Severus’s hand on your clenched fist under the table. 

“ _Who has been with me all evening_ , working on the Wolfsbane potion,” Severus said sternly, the room even fell into silence, “Perhaps you would all spend your energy on someone _worth_ investigating.” 

The silence was deafening and you saw Remus shift uncomfortably in his seat. 

Dumbledore stood and voiced his trust that no one inside would cooperate with Sirius. 

.

.

Severus was tasked to patrol that night and insisted you stay in your quarters lest anyone suspects you more. He said he would return to report later and you were left trying to stay awake until then.

Just as you found yourself drifting off on the sofa, you heard a knock on your door. 

Perhaps Severus has returned with information—

“Miss Granger?” You looked down at the girl and your sleepiness was replaced with surprise. 

“I apologise, Ms. Black, I—“

“What in Merlin’s name are you doing here?” In your panic, you pulled her inside before anyone caught her. 

“I promise I won’t ask of why you’re at Hogwarts, I just wanted to know about…” she started nervously. 

Her curiosity seemed to rival yours. It wasn’t exactly a healthy trait. 

“Sirius Black?” You raised an eyebrow at her. She nodded meekly. You sighed and motioned for her to follow you to your sitting area.

“How do you even know I’m here, Miss Granger?” You noticed she was still in her uniform. Something was off, but you couldn’t quite place what. 

“I heard Dumbledore talking about you in the hall when we were sleeping there…” she trailed off, “…and this is the only door that doesn’t lead to a class in the main dungeons.” 

Truly she was gifted, but… 

“And most importantly what made you so sure that you could trust me?”

“Dumbledore trusts you... I mean he's letting you stay here...” 

_Ah, children._

“He doesn’t all that much, really, but that’s beside the point.” You said, she shifted in her seat, “I’ve no contact with Sirius Black, Miss Granger, but I’m sure you see that blind trust could be dangerous…” 

She nodded. 

“Now let us not have your visit be in vain. What would you like to know?” 

It wouldn’t hurt to indulge her curiosity a bit. 

She asked you a number of questions, most of which you could not really answer. You hardly knew the man, and parts of him that you did know was delivered through the lips of other family members. Miss Granger was delighted that you trusted her with the information anyway.

“By the way, where’s Weasley and Potter? Was it too risky to sneak three people out the tower?” 

She looked away and palmed something in her robe. 

“We aren’t exactly on good terms right now…”

“Oh?”

“I got this pet cat, you see, and Ron always blames me when his rat disappears.” 

“Well, that is what cats do, Miss Granger,” you were about to say more, but the fireplace crackled into green. 

Severus wouldn’t take kindly to a student wandering like this.

You stood up and hurriedly pulled her towards the door. “I hope I’ve helped you in some way, Miss Granger. It was nice meeting you again.” 

“You too, Ms. Black. Thank you,” she said sincerely, stepping out the door just as she saw a figure with black robes emerge from the fireplace. 

You planted yourself back on your sofa and yawned. 

“Found anything?” 

“No, unfortunately. He’s slipped through once more.”

He stood there awkwardly clasping his hands as the silence enveloped the room. He didn’t dare bring up the fact that he had let himself in as you suggested.

Your sleepiness made you unable to hold back your grin at his adorableness. 

“Come have a seat, will you?” You patted the space next to you. He sat down stiffly but let his hand fall between the two of you, palm up. You knew he was silently asking to hold yours and you happily obliged. 

He relaxed a bit and leaned back in the sofa. 

“Were you… waiting for me?” he asked as you laid your head on his shoulder. 

“More or less,” you murmured, moving even closer to snuggle against his arm. 

His warmth was so inviting that you felt yourself slip into slumber. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A family can be two goth parents and their shiny lilac son -> [[picture](https://palatefor-strangeremedies.tumblr.com/post/185929688617/a-family-can-be-two-goth-parents-and-their-shiny)]
> 
> Also Christmas Severus by EliDeetz if you haven't seen it -> [[link](https://nobodys-baby-now.tumblr.com/post/185647224342/date-night-inspired-by-palatefor-strangeremedies)]
> 
> also, lift... elevator... lift... idk I'm not British nor American so both sound good to me. ~~Keep that in mind anytime you see something accidentally not British.~~


	16. Fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to wait for the comments to accumulate in the last chapter, but I have barely any patience lol. Still kind of panicking about the exam but oh well. Life happens. I needn't worry too much. 
> 
> Thank you to AyushiSushi, ClusterxAmaryllis, Sac1i, LightOwl1505, Cherry_Popsicle, Romancelover38, and EliDeetz for leaving comments on the last chapter! and thank you for 250 kudos!!!! I'm gonna cry (in happiness)
> 
> Also fun fact, I had to take several breaks writing this one because I was overwhelmed by the tenderness. I'm sure you'll see what I mean. 
> 
> Enjoy!

You stirred awake with your neck stiff, legs halfway off the sofa, and a vague memory of being moved last night. You groaned, shifting your position… you froze as you got a whiff of something like… cologne? and something else that’s strangely familiar—

You opened your eyes and found yourself wrapped in Severus’s cape. Warmth spread throughout your entire body and you buried yourself deeper into the fabric. It was as comforting as snuggling into his arm last night…

Oh, Merlin… you fell asleep on him.    
And he let you have his cape as a blanket. 

You felt yourself get warmer by the minute and slowly drifted back to sleep… until your neck gave a sudden painful tug. You groaned and reluctantly sat up, massaging the sore spot. 

The cloak pooled down your waist and you looked down. You were still in yesterday’s clothing. 

It seemed that you need a shower. 

You almost didn’t want to let go of the cape as you stood up to walk to the bath. 

.

.

You realised it was Sunday as Severus didn’t show up for breakfast. 

_Well, he didn’t need his cape right away… right?_

.

.

.

.

Sometime before dinner, you heard a familiar knock on your door. You opened it and his reaction was priceless. 

He froze there, like the first time you kissed his cheek, but his lips were stuck slightly parted as he let out a small gasp and he had his own hand clasped in a death grip in front of him. 

“Something a matter, Severus?” You asked innocently. 

He gulped and cleared his throat before uttering in the meekest voice, “my… cloak…”

“I rather like it on me.” You stepped back from the door and let his cloak swivel around you. 

“You’re sinking in it…” 

“Well, that’s entirely the point,” you pulled the fabric around you and grinned. 

He cleared his throat again and held his hand in front of him. 

You pouted and reluctantly took off his cloak, placing it in his hand. He nodded his head towards his door and you walked past him out into the hallway. 

You didn’t hear him follow you and curiously looked back. You barely caught him put the cloak to his nose before placing it on his shoulders. A small smile graced his lips and he immediately tried to hide it when he saw you stare at him from down the hallway. 

You felt your chest constrict and wondered if this is how you die; a Severus-induced heart attack. 

He passed you without a word as if nothing happened. 

It took all your willpower to not attack him with kisses. 

* * *

The weeks rolled by. The potion-brewing was laced with soft touches and kisses, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. You could tell that Severus was growing bored of making the same potion every month (not to mention for someone he doesn’t particularly like), he’d bug you about the situation in the castle when you tidied up for the night, and somewhere along the way you’d find his hand already on your waist.

It made you want to kiss him. _Properly_ kiss him. 

You had tried to, but he always pulled away just in time to make it chaste. 

Perhaps he wasn’t ready… you didn’t mind. You’ll give him all the time he needed. 

* * *

Valentine’s Day came around and you convinced him to have a slightly more festive dinner to celebrate.

But first, you needed to pay a visit to someone whose favourite holiday was Valentine’s— at least before he lost all his memory… 

You entered the Janus Thickey ward and found that it was indeed _still_ his favourite holiday. 

The ward was in utter chaos. Many of the patients were out of bed and either yelling at Gilderoy or joining in his fun.

_Who in Mungo Bonham’s name was in charge of this ward?_

“Gilderoy! Who bloody h—“ you sidestepped just in time to avoid a cloud of sparkly dust he blew at you, “—gave you GLITTER?” 

“Miriam, why?” He answered innocently. You ran a hand over your face and exhaled. 

You palmed your badge and spoke through it, “Clean up in the Janus Thickey ward, please. Thank you.” 

You turned to Gilderoy and took the jar of pink glitter from him. 

“Gilderoy, I’m sorry but I have to take this, it’s not safe to have it in the hospital.”

“Why? Isn’t it just… magic dust?” 

The only thing magic about it is that it gets to places you couldn’t reach.

“That’s exactly why,” 

“Aw, alright… I was done using it anyway,” Gilderoy sat on his bed and a puff of glitter went into the air, “I made this for you.” 

You took the glittery pink card from him and shook off the excess dust from it. He wanted to give you a hug but you held a hand in front of you. “Ah, you’re covered in glitter, Gilderoy. Please don’t,” you chastised, “Happy Valentine’s Day to you.” 

He smiled sheepishly and shook the glitter off himself. 

You left just as Miriam Strout entered and gasped at the room. You hoped that that was enough for her to learn her lesson. 

.

.

.

“There’s something…” Severus squinted at you from across the table. 

You cursed and stood up to shake the pink dust off your hair, away from the food. 

“It’s Gilderoy. One of the healers foolishly let him have glitter.” You turned to him for approval and he gave you a once over before pointing at another spot in your hair. You groaned and brushed the area off with your fingers. 

“I’m not letting you near me until you get it all off.” 

“You might want to reword that sentence there, Severus,” you grinned, still dusting yourself off. It took a second for him to process what you meant and he growled before turning back to his food. 

His hair hid his face but you could see his ears turn red. 

* * *

The head healer at Mungo’s apparently noticed you were done with your paperwork and gave you a new stack to rifle through, this time some from the other wards.

_What were you, an office intern?_

You supposed it was the price to pay for working elsewhere most of the time...

You sighed and leaned back against Severus who was beside you on the sofa, dealing with his own paperwork. It was still well over a month till June, but he had to prepare for seven different years of Potions exams. He was scribbling with the quill you gave him last year and gave you no mind as you rested your head on his shoulder.

“Severus," You were bored, deathly so. 

"A moment," he muttered, flipping a page of the paper in his hand and scribbling some more, "let me finish this." He completed his work and you felt his arm move to wrap around your middle. “What would ease your boredom?”

_Snogging would be nice—_

“You seem adamant on doing so as of late,” he said before you could even berate your own thoughts. You growled and clawed lightly at his arm. He huffed a laugh and you felt it in your hair. 

“I’ll stop if you want me to,” you said, moving to hold his hand. 

“…I rather enjoyed watching you try.”

_Oh. So it wasn’t because he wasn’t ready…_

“You’re insufferable, Severus,” you clawed his hand again before turning to face him. 

He had that smug smirk on his lips and you tried to wipe it off his face by kissing him. 

The tables turned, however, and you let out a gasp as you felt _his_ tongue on your bottom lip. The hand on your waist tightened its grip and the other went to cup your face as he deepened the kiss. It was a slightly awkward position, but that thought went far from your mind as your tongues met in a heated battle. 

Your hand went to his nape as your pulse quickened and you felt your insides meld into the warmth stirring inside you. 

He growled and his teeth grazed your lip as he pulled away to catch his breath. You found yourself unable to look at him, burying your face in the crook of his neck. He held you in an embrace and you could feel the heat radiating off of him as well. A quick peek at him and you saw his face was flushed, his eyes averted to the side. 

It was ridiculous, you were like teenagers having your first kiss. 

“Sometimes… I wonder,” you said, breath still shallow. 

“Hm?”

“If we would hit it off as well as we have… as students.”

His hand stroked your back as he sighed. 

“We were different people back then,” he said, some sort of regret in his voice. You realised an innocent thought has made you enter dangerous territory. 

“Just a thought,” you pecked his cheek, “I wasn’t exactly set in finding someone then…” 

“Didn’t your parents meddle?” He asked curiously. You were glad he was taking it back into lighter conversation.

“Somewhat… but they let me marry my job,” you laughed. 

“From the looks of it…” he stared at your paperwork strewn about the coffee table, “…I’d say you’re considering divorce.” 

You laughed and pecked him on the cheek. He grabbed your hand to hold it in his.

Needless to say, neither of you managed to finish your work that day. 

* * *

“What is that?” You pointed at a trunk on the floor. You’ve noticed it moving before, but right then it was flipping about and shaking uncontrollably.

“A boggart,” Remus answered easily, downing his Wolfsbane without even gagging. 

“A boggart…” you repeated incredulously.

“Would you like to have a go at it? I think it’s getting stuffy in there,”

“No, thank you…”

“Really? Aren’t you curious of what your boggart is?” 

_Well, if he put it that way…_

What _would_ it be? You weren’t quite afraid of anything as of recently…

“I see I have your interest,” Remus smirked and stood up to walk to the moving trunk, “I trust you know the Riddikulus charm?”

“Of course,” you muttered. 

_Would it be your parents? How awkward would it be if they appeared in here…_

You held your wand at the ready and Remus delightedly opened the trunk. 

He reflexively stepped back as a loud clatter sounded. The boggart landed in front of you and it was…

“A… desk?” Remus said, sounding severely disappointed. 

A stack of papers suddenly appeared atop it and you grimaced, trying to think of something fun to turn it into. There was nothing amusing about your workplace, except for—

You realised your supposedly greatest fear had already come true. 

“Riddikulus,” you waved your wand and Remus was confused as a blonde man appeared on the desk to mess it up. 

“Who’s that?” 

“The former Defence teacher,” you replied. Remus still gave you a look and you finally got what he was implying. “He lost his memory, he’s now re-learning everything like a child.” 

“Ah,” Remus stood in front of you and the boggart turned into the moon before he charmed it into a balloon to force it back in the trunk, “you never told me you and Severus had a lovechild.” 

“Honestly, Remus,” you rolled your eyes and crossed your arms. He laughed heartily and went to lock the trunk. 

“I had thought your boggart would be… I don’t know…” Remus had that mischief about his face, “…kissing Severus?” 

You suddenly remembered that snog you had just weeks ago. It rendered you weak every time you thought of it. Severus had returned to playing hard to get after that and it frustrated you— which amused him, as you saw a smirk every time he pulled away from a kiss. 

You felt like he was challenging you. 

It was exciting. 

“That’s not exactly a fear anymore,” you muttered to yourself. 

Remus heard it and choked on his drink. 

You didn’t wait for him to recover and exited through the fireplace. 


	17. Resentment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooooooohhhhh things are happening in this one! It's about 2.5K too, oh my. This is why I couldn't wait to upload...
> 
> Thank you to AyushiSushi, Sac1i, LightOwl1505, batmanwearsflipflops, Yuuchan_Hrabia, blissa, and hooliganism for leaving comments on the last one! 
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> Warning: descriptions of blood towards the end

The day after the full moon in May gave you an uneasy stir and Severus noticed your discomfort at breakfast. 

“What’s wrong?”

“I just have an odd feeling,” you eyed your badge which was idle on the table. If something happened to Remus, it would have given you a sign. Perhaps you should just go check… “I’ll be right back, Severus.”

You fetched the first aid bag and went to the fireplace.

.

.

You knocked on Remus’s door and waited for an answer. Minutes passed and you were greeted with silence. 

Maybe something did happen to him… 

“Remus?” You called, knocking on the door again. 

No answer. 

“I’m coming in,” you warned, before muttering _Alohomora_ at the lock. It clicked open and you let yourself in. The man in question was huddled on his couch, a tattered blanket wrapped around him. 

Remus stirred awake and sat up. You saw red claw marks peek over his shirt collar and hurried over to him to put dittany on the wounds. 

“Good morning,” Remus said almost deliriously. 

“It certainly wasn’t for you,” you dropped a few drops of dittany on his neck and he hissed, “what happened, Remus?”

“I found out the hard way that sugar does make it useless,” he chuckled and rubbed his eyes. 

“…what?”

“I put sugar in the potion just to see—“

“You _what?_ ” You almost shouted. 

“It’s just a harmless experiment, (f/n), and I got the brunt of it—“ 

“ _Harmless?_ ” You exclaimed, “Where did you wake up at dawn?” 

“Just outside the shack—“

“Just _outside_ — Do you realise you could have walked to Hogsmeade and _killed_ someone?” You stood up and loomed over him. He stayed silent as the weight of his actions dawned on him.

You looked at him in disbelief. How could he be so foolish?

Perhaps that thoughtless teenager you couldn’t see the first time was still in there somewhere. 

“Severus and I worked hours… _nights_ on that potion… and you just…” you sighed in disappointment, “You could have at least told me. We could have taken safety measures—“ you shook your head. 

Enough was enough. 

“I trusted you, Remus,” you ran a hand over your face, “and you…” 

How did he even do it? You were right there every time he drank the potion… Perhaps you should have suspected when he didn’t gag the least bit. 

Severus’s suspicions suddenly didn’t seem too farfetched… Remus clearly had some tricks. 

You exhaled slowly and grabbed the first aid bag, leaving the dittany on the table. 

You left without a word, slamming the door on your way out. 

.

.

“What happened?” Severus said as he looked up and saw your furious expression. You sat yourself down on the chair and inhaled. 

“He tampered with the potion,” you said, “right under my nose… I didn’t know how—“

Severus reached his hand across the table and held yours. 

“It’s not… your fault,” he assured, you could see he was holding back his own anger.

You turned your hand and held his as you tried to calm yourself. 

The feeling of betrayal never quite left you. 

* * *

Exams week arrived, you and Severus found yourselves half-heartedly making the last batch of Wolfsbane for the school year.

Your interactions with Remus became as it was when you first met him. You didn’t speak to him and he didn’t dare start a conversation with you. He didn’t even look at you as he gave you the vial of dittany back. 

* * *

Nearing the end of the week, you were sat with Severus for breakfast and caught a glimpse of the front page of the paper.

“That’s just an accident waiting to happen,” you commented. Severus flipped the paper to see the cover. 

“Wizard buys cursed pot from Egypt,” he read aloud, “…it looks right up your alley.” 

Severus must have noticed you worked in Artefact Accidents during his visit. 

You saw the man in the picture happily holding a seemingly harmless pot. 

“At least I’ll finally do something in my job.” 

.

.

It was past midnight when you finished working on the potion. 

You put your scalpel down and it made an unnatural rattle. Upon further inspection, you realised it was your badge that made the sound. It was rattling violently and the gem blinked red. 

An emergency… in your ward. 

You picked it up and it gave you a pull, “Do portkeys not work here?” you asked Severus. 

“No, why—“ 

You rushed and pecked him on the cheek before going to the fireplace, “If I’m not back by tomorrow… I’m sorry but you’ll have to deal with Lupin.” 

He nodded and you stepped into the flames. 

.

.

As soon as you landed, the badge activated its portkey and transported you in front of the emergency room of Artefact Accidents. 

The hallways were deserted but you could hear a distressed wail from inside the room. 

Sure enough, when you burst through the doors, you saw the man from the front page this morning with two obviously inexperienced healers holding what looked like a wooden snake from the man’s neck. A woman who you presumed was his wife, stood watching in horror. 

One, she’s not supposed to be in here, two, the cursed pot lay on the ground where anyone could easily kick it, three, the man is clearly showing signs of being strangled by the snake. 

_Who put these two in charge of graveyard shift?_

You pulled out your wand. 

It seemed that you had your work cut out for you. 

.

.

.

It was rare when things were out of your expertise… and this seemed to be one of those instances. 

You only managed to prevent the snake from strangling the man, but it still resisted your protection charms and refused to let go. He wasn’t in any further danger as long as you were there to maintain the spell.

You reckon no one would like to live with a wooden snake permanently stuck to their throat. 

Several other healers-in-charge agreed that you should call in a counter-curse expert. Unfortunately, she came from abroad and required time to arrive, so you were left keeping a close watch on the patient throughout the rest of the night. 

.

.

You felt your eyelids grow heavy and switched shifts to rest a bit in the break room. 

When you woke up it was noon, and you were called to intensive care as the counter-curse expert had arrived. 

You worked with her for hours to figure out how to undo the curse. 

.

.

.

By the time you were finished, you found that it was already night again. 

The man was moved to overnight stay as he only needed to recover from shock and bruises, so you found your cue to leave. 

You sighed and basked in the satisfaction of helping a patient. It has… been awhile. 

You saw your house in the distance and longed for a good night’s sleep—

“What do you want?” You sighed exasperatedly as you saw the two ministry men in front of your door. They ceased their knocking and turned to you in surprise. 

“Where were you?” 

“At work,” you gestured to your healer apron under the layer of coats. 

They turned to each other and one of them fetched something out of his pocket. 

“We found records of your travels to Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry,” he pulled out a piece of paper, “and we have a warrant of interrogation.” 

You had a feeling you weren’t going to get the good night’s sleep. 

.

.

.

“What were you doing at Hogwarts?” The man asked as the other one pulled out a quill and notepad. “Helping Sirius Black into the castle, were you?”

You pinched the bridge of your nose. 

“No,” you said, trying to seem calm, “Albus Dumbledore offered me a job.” 

It was the truth, though not the entirety of the situation.

“Is that so? Do you have anything to confirm this?”

“You could ask the headmaster yourself,” you massaged your temple, feeling a migraine coming along. 

“We’re—“ 

An owl flew through the window and gave the man with the notebook a scrap of paper. They discussed something in hushed whispers before looking at you. 

“Ms. Black, you’re going to have to come with us,” the man stood and drew out his wand. 

“You can’t _arrest_ me—” 

“No, we’re going to ask the headmaster.” He smirked and pointed his wand at you. 

* * *

You arrived via the floo and found the Headmaster’s Office deserted. It was dark and one of the men lit up a candle.

You suddenly felt something strange about your chest.

“What’s going on with that?” The man with the wand pointed at your badge. 

You looked at it to find that it was buzzing. 

_Strange._

It wasn’t like its usual rattle, more of a constant low buzz that barely made a sound. You curiously palmed it and felt it pull you towards the Hospital Wing. 

“Gentlemen, would you mind if we walk to the Hospital Wing? Just to make sure everything is alright there.”

They looked at you suspiciously but considered the headmaster might be there and gestured towards the door. 

.

.

When you neared the infirmary, you could hear shouting from inside. The two ministry men halted you from entering, holding you by the point of their wands. 

The buzzing of your badge became more insistent. 

“Calm down, man! You’re talking nonsense!” 

The voice was familiar, but you couldn’t recall who it was. 

“YOU DON’T KNOW POTTER!” You realised the loud voice was Severus, “HE DID IT, I KNOW HE DID IT—” 

You’ve never heard him explode like this… _what in Merlin’s name was going on?_

You barely heard the rest of the conversation as their voices lowered. The two men looked at you and back at the door, unsure of what to do.

Suddenly, the infirmary door burst open and Severus strode out. 

He abruptly stopped in his tracks as he saw you. There was something in his eyes like… shame?

Your badged stop buzzing as you caught a glimpse of the red gash across his front. Before you could say anything, he looked away with a scowl and walked past you in a hurried pace.

“Am I free to go yet?” You anxiously asked the two officials. Severus was already out of sight. 

“Wait for the minister,” one of them said. 

So the other voice was the minister… _what was he doing here?_

The door opened once more and out strolled Dumbledore with the minister beside him. They were surprised to see you and the two men there.

“Who’s this?” Fudge asked them. 

“(f/n) Black, sir,” one explained, “you told us to arrive here, but we were in the middle of interrogating her at her house.” 

Fudge furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. 

“Well, if she was home just now, Minister, that means that she had nothing to do with the incident.” Dumbledore chipped in. 

_Incident?_ Questions were just piling up in your brain by the minute. 

“Fair point, Dumbledore. I suppose she’s free to go,” 

“But her travels to Hogwarts, sir—“

“I put her up to it,” Dumbledore cut in, “I’m sure you saw the Matron had a lot on her hands.” 

Fudge nodded politely and motioned for the men to lower their wands. 

“Oh, on that note, I would like a word with Ms. Black. I hope you don’t mind finding your way out yourselves, Minister, gentlemen,” Dumbledore smiled. Fudge muttered that it was no problem and left with the men.

“Ask your questions,” Dumbledore said just as they were out of earshot. It appears Severus wasn’t the only one steadfast on reading your thoughts. 

“What happened to Severus?” 

A smile tugged at his lips and you saw a gleam through his half-moon spectacles. “He… had a disappointment,” 

_That’s not what you meant—_

“The minister promised him something,” Dumbledore continued, “and took it back only a moment later…”

His cryptic explanation only arose more questions in your head. What did the minister promise him? Why did the minister take it back? Why had he offered it in the first place? 

That migraine you felt earlier gave a painful jolt and you massaged your temple. 

“There are multiple sides to this story, (f/n). Why don’t you… recount Severus’s first?” He nodded his head towards the hallway, “Perhaps while you treat his wounds? You know how he is… I worry he’ll catch something.” 

His gentle but insisting stare gave you no choice but to do as he says. 

.

.

You fetched your first aid bag and entered Severus’s office through the fireplace. You knew he wouldn’t let you in if you knocked on the door. 

The room was a mess. Severus had taken his rage on the cauldron of Wolfsbane and had apparently turned it over, spilling the contents all over the floor. Jars of ingredients were broken all over the place and he was in the middle of shoving things off the worktable. 

“Severus,” you called gently. 

He turned to you in surprise and hissed, “Leave me, (f/n).”

“No,” you said simply. He growled and pulled his bloody hand from pieces of glass as he turned away from you. You carefully approached him. “Your wounds, Severus—” 

He shrugged off your hand as you tried putting it on his shoulder. 

“They’ll heal,” he muttered dismissively.

“If they’re where I think they’re from… you know fair well they won’t, Severus,” you carefully stepped over the shards on the floor and stood in front of him. You put your palm against his cheek and he finally looked at you. 

You’ve never seen Severus’s eyes so full of emotion. His walls were cracking… and in the worst ways. 

Shame was still prevalent above it all. 

“Dumbledore told me the minister… promised you something,” you proceeded cautiously, stroking his cheek with your thumb, “what was it?” 

He placed his bloody hand over yours on his cheek. 

“Order of Merlin,” he muttered. 

Suddenly everything clicked into place. The incident had something to do with Sirius… as Dumbledore dismissed your involvement and… Severus was going to be commended for his involvement but—

“But he escaped,” Severus said, hatred clearly in his voice, “and the minister withdrew the title.” 

“Severus, it’s just a title—“ 

His clean hand went to hold your chin. 

“It’s not _just_ …” he muttered. You furrowed your eyebrows at him. 

“What do you mean? It’s not like you to worry over—“

He roughly grabbed your face and his eyes bored into yours. You weren’t a legilimens, but at that moment, you knew what he _wasn’t_ saying. 

He wanted that title… _for you._

It wasn’t just a title to him because it meant for your acceptance as a pure-blood to redeem his blood status… and it was just within his reach, before they took it away from him. 

He suddenly let go of you and walked to the other room. You heard his armchair skid as he sat. 

You looked at his smeared blood on the back of your hand. 

_Oh, Severus…_

You approached him again and this time he didn’t shrug you off when you put a hand on his shoulder. 

“I don’t care about your titles, Severus…” Your other hand went over his chest, just above the gash, as you held him from behind. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before covering your hand with his own. “I care about _you_ ,” you said into his hair. 

You didn’t realise the weight of your words until it bounced off the walls back at you. 

He lifted one of your hands and gave a kiss to your palm. 

“Now please, _let me_ care for you.” 

You pulled away to fetch the first aid bag. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next one's gonna take a while to write because it's gonna be... you guessed it... SHAMELESS SMUT
> 
> As per usual, my explicit chapters are skippable, so feel free to do so if it's not for you :)


	18. Pleasures (Explicit)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this one became longer than I expected... oh well, it is smut... I'm sure you wouldn't mind ;)  
> Oh and I didn't want to bump the rating up just because of one chapter so...
> 
> Thank you to AyushiSushi, LightOwl1505, Sac1i, MiscreantBrat, derpypasta8811, Romancelover38, Yuuchan_Hrabia, blissa, Cherry_Popsicle, and EliDeetz for all the LOVELY COMMENTS!!!!!!! 
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> in case you didn't notice:  
>  **WARNING: THIS CHAPTER IS EXPLICIT**

"Open your shirt, Severus," you said as you finished healing his hand. You had pulled a stool in front of him and he didn't even flinch as you pulled the tiny shards of glass out of his cuts. You cleaned the blood off of him and a quick fix of dittany sealed the wounds.

You put the bloody cloth away as he started undoing his cravat. He wasn't wearing the one you gave him, thankfully, as blood and dirt would be all over it.

"You look tired, (f/n)," he pulled the fabric off and set it aside.

"I am, Severus," you said. The lack of sleep and the ghost of the migraine earlier finally caught up to you. You closed your eyes as you felt the tip of his finger trace the side of your face before going back to unbuttoning his many, many buttons.

He wasn't doing it in a rush, too... It was almost as if he was... giving you a show.

Well, it wouldn't be above him to tease you like this... He pulled the collar open and exposed his neck—

You tried to pay it no mind and pulled your stool closer. Your knees were now between each other. 

He finished with his buttons— two layers of them, including the undershirt, _Merlin's beard_ — and you leaned forward to finally pull it aside and inspect his wounds.

There was a large gash on his chest and though it has been left for a while, it has not shown signs of healing.

"It's going to scar," you fetched the dropper of dittany which was premixed with silver. "Didn't he..."

"He forgot the last dose," Severus drew in a shaky breath as he felt your thumb trace the newly closed wound— It was dim in the room, so you couldn't quite see if the cut has closed properly...

At least that's what you tell yourself.

"...by the time I noticed, it was too late." Severus continued, his voice uneven.

You pretended not to notice and continued your ministrations until every section of the cut was properly closed. You put away the vial and traced the scar with your finger once more... Just to make sure—

"(f/n)," Severus grabbed your hand.

"I'm sorry, I—" you stammered, trying to pull your hand away. Perhaps you've—

" _(f/n)_ ," he drawled out your name in an almost needy tone. Your hand was placed on his knee and you felt heat pool down to your...

You licked your lips. 

"Severus," you said, "...are you sure? If we do this..."

"...there's no going back," he finished for you. His nails grazed the back of your hand as he pulled it up his thigh. "Frankly, I don't think we could either way."

"Fair point," you smiled in agreement as your hand almost reached all the way up but he lifted it to his chest and leaned in for a kiss.

_Such a tease._

Your other hand found its favourite place on his nape, fingers combing through his hair, and the kiss quickly turned heated as your tongues collided. It was much more fierce than that snog you had with him, but his timidness still showed as he didn't dare touch you anywhere but your neck and waist, even as he was pulling you into his lap.

You pushed him back as you climbed to straddle his thigh and he let out a gasp as his back collided with the back of the chair.

His face was flushed and he looked up at you with lust clearly clouding his eyes.

"You can touch me, Severus," you assured, leaning in for another open-mouthed kiss. 

He hummed and placed his hands on the back of your thighs, slowly moving upwards. You gripped his hair as he palmed your backside through your robes before moving further upwards to untie your apron. 

You helped him get it off along with your badge and sat yourself down on his thigh as you went to undo the front of your garb. His hands rested on your hips as he waited with a watchful stare. 

It gave you a chance to inspect him in return.

His breathing was quicker, you could see his ribs fall and rise from the half-open shirt. He visibly gulped as you undid the buttons over your chest and you found yourself wanting to kiss his throat— 

Realising that there was nothing stopping you, you left your buttons and kissed him on his lips first, then his cheek, his jaw and finally down to his neck. He let out a groan as you bit him and you felt his nails dig into your hips. 

"(f/n)," he hissed as you grabbed his hair to tilt his head, giving you better access to his neck. You bit him again and this time he gave a growl before he pushed you back. "(f/n)... I'd like to do this properly," he said, though still happily receiving your kiss. 

"Do you think we'll make it to the bedroom?" You chuckled, cupping his face. 

"We might," he smirked, "it's not far."

"Lead the way, darling," you pecked him and went to stand. He growled at the nickname and stood, placing his hand on your waist as he led you to his room.

He wordlessly unlocked his door with a wave of his hand and sat you down on the foot of the bed. 

You briefly took in the surroundings as you took off your shoes. 

The colour scheme of the room was mostly black and his bed was accented with snakes. You wondered if that was given as head of Slytherin or if he had modelled it that way. 

There were a lot of books, too, in neat stacks on the floor beside the bed. 

It was an organised mess and spoke utterly of Severus. You were honoured, in a way, to be let in such a private space of his.

The man himself was a few ways in front of you, pulling his shirt off his shoulders. He stepped out of his shoes and you could make out the lines of his ribs and the trail of hair down his abdomen. It led to a fairly large bulge on the front of his trousers...

His hand went to his neck nervously and you raised an eyebrow as you shrugged off the top part of your robes, exposing your bra. 

If you knew you were going to have a night like this, you would have worn one of the nicer ones. With the knickers to match. 

Oh well. Perhaps you could save it for next time—

The blush spread from his face to his neck and ears and you realised he had invaded your thoughts. You pursed your lips in mock disapproval as you beckoned him to approach. 

You didn't quite mind the legilimency, reading your thoughts this time was at his own risk. It wasn't the time to hold back your desires.

He stopped in front of you, staring down with his hair shrouding his face like a dark halo. 

You traced the trail of hair down his front with your finger and locked eyes with him as you palmed his erection through his trousers. 

He hissed and you were pushed down onto the bed, leaning on your elbows.

Pity, you had hoped to taste him—

He growled as he read your thoughts again and you found him pulling off the rest of your robe, leaving you in your undergarments. He stood back up to inspect you and you grinned as he undid his trousers. The garment slid down his legs and—

"Really, Severus?" You raised an eyebrow. 

"Hm?"

"So when I found you in your nightclothes that time..." you grinned, "...you weren't wearing anything underneath?" 

He growled as his face turned completely red and kicked away his trousers.

His cock was exposed directly in front of your face and he was... quite the size. _Oh my..._

You held him in your hand and he let out a low groan as he gripped onto your hair. You felt him twitch as you ran your tongue along the underside.

You tried taking him in your mouth and it was almost too much for him. 

"(f/n)," he hissed, pulling at your hair, "I haven't— I'm going to—" 

He withdrew himself out of your mouth and pushed you down onto the bed once more. You hurriedly unclasped your bra and pulled it off before you laid yourself down on the bed. He gave an appreciative stare and smirked at the sight. His hand roamed up your side but stopped shy of your breast as he climbed on top of you. 

Oh, Severus... ever so shy. 

You grinned against his kiss and grabbed his hand, moving it to palm your breast. He finally braved to squeeze it and went to trail kisses down your neck. 

"Severus," you breathed as he sucked on your pulse. You felt his cock rest on your abdomen and rubbed yourself against him. He fingered the band of your knickers and shamelessly tore it off.

Well, if he's going to ruin your underwear like that... maybe you shouldn't wear the expensive ones— 

He growled at you again, a low sound in the back of his throat, and captured your lips in a searing kiss. 

"Don't tempt me," Severus muttered as he parted.

"Given your performance so far, Severus, I am hoping for an encore," you grinned and kissed his shoulder, "and it's not like I told you to enter my thoughts."

He hummed amusedly and propped himself up to properly face you. 

His face turned serious but you could see a faint hint of cheek in his eyes... 

"Are you certain of this, (f/n)?" he moved a hand between the two of you, "Fornicating with a half-blood..." 

You laughed. "My, my, your words, Severus," you placed a finger to your abdomen and muttered a brief protection spell. 

You had learned on your own how to do it wandlessly after they taught it with at healer school— well, not that you needed it that much... 

He looked at you with a raised eyebrow and you saw him slick himself up with also a wandless spell. 

You wondered how he can look so handsome with his hair messed up and his face flushed and sweating. 

"Get on with it, darling," you wound your legs around him and with the confirmation, he positioned himself against your entrance. 

He groaned as he slowly pushed himself inside you.

You gripped his shoulders and your moans tangled with his as he kissed you sensuously. Severus paused for a few moments as he propped himself on his elbows beside your head. 

His breathing was as ragged as your own and you felt it warm on your neck. Your mind couldn't fully wrap around the fact that Severus was… inside you. 

_To hell with your family rules…_

He slowly moved his hips and you felt everything intensify. All you could hear was his low groans mixed with your pleasurable moans and the sound of him moving in and out.

"Severus," you whimpered. Your release was approaching too fast for your own liking but you supposed that it was because you hadn't done this in a while... 

He moved faster and from the looks of it, he too wasn't going to last much longer. 

"(f/n), I'm close," he muttered, a hint of embarrassment in his voice. 

You gripped his shoulders and muttered, "me too." 

He growled and moved his hips faster. 

You were sure your nails would leave marks on his shoulder as you clenched around him and came undone, all while moaning his name. Severus let out a long groan as he kissed you and pulled one of your hands off him to hold as he released himself inside you. 

He kissed you once more before pulling out and collapsing on top of you, still holding your hand. 

"Severus," you said. Severus didn't have a large frame, but he was still quite heavy... "as much as I enjoy having you on top of me... I can't breathe, darling." 

He groaned and released your hand as he lazily flopped over to the side. 

"Fancy a bath, Severus?" You turned to him and found his eyes half-lidded and the corner of his lips turned up in a slight smile. 

It seemed that he was more than content. It put a smile to your face and you tucked his hair behind his ear. 

"Must we?" He muttered hoarsely. 

"Well, I'd like to wash off the stench of work and sex off before getting a good night's sleep," you cupped his face and he held your hand. 

You let him bask in the afterglow until his eyes fluttered shut. 

"Severus,"

"Fine." 

. 

. 

. 

You leaned back against him in the tub and he placed his arm around your middle.

"You insisted upon a bath, and yet you're the one half asleep," Severus complained, nudging your hair with his nose.

"Well, you noticed I'm tired. I haven't properly slept since yesterday— or the day before that, if you're counting hours," you snuggled further into him, "I just don't want to wake up in the middle of my sleep needing a bath."

He groaned and you felt it in his chest. 

The two of you sat there silently as the water bubbled with magic.

"Earlier..." Severus muttered, the timidness in his voice, "...you mentioned of next time... will there...?" 

"If you'll see me in the summer, Sev," you sleepily tried to kiss him and failed. 

He huffed a laugh and held you tighter as he quietly said, "Of course." 

* * *

You stirred awake as you felt something shift from under your head. You peeked open your eye and saw Severus struggling to get out from under you.

“Where are you off to?” You draped an arm over him and he froze. You snuggled back into him and inhaled. He still smelled freshly of the bath and you really didn’t want to wake up right now… 

“Dumbledore just called,” he said, “requesting my presence as he’s meeting with the minister again this morning.” 

“And you were going to leave me alone in your bed?” You teased, putting your hand on his chest. 

You both gulped as it occurred that you just slept with each other… in both senses of the word. Severus stroked your back with his hand. 

“I didn’t want to wake you from your much-needed rest,” you felt his nose in your hair, “you’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like…”

The shyness in his voice made you want to hold him tighter against yourself. You did just that and he let you snuggle him for a few moments before tugging away once more. 

You groaned and propped yourself up to kiss him before finally letting him go.

He pulled the covers off of him and sat up, giving you the view of his back. You traced a finger along his spine as he remained there. 

“(f/n),” he warned, shivering under your touch, “don’t tempt me.” 

You chuckled and he got out of bed to fetch a fresh set of clothes. 

Severus went about dressing until he noticed you watching him. You propped your head up and smiled. 

“Since you’re occupied for breakfast… come for lunch, later?” You asked. 

“Naturally,” he smirked as he went to the door. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh we're approaching the end... I almost don't want to... bUT i do cause as I always say, there's still a long long way to go. and by that I mean like at least 50 chapters more... stay with me folks. I'll finish this. one way or another.......


	19. Perspectives and farewells

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooookay I didn't want to update back to back like this but hey, can't help myself. I just wanna finish this part so I can get on with studying, like get it all out of my head. 
> 
> Oh and it will be at least the end of this week before another update. I need to catch up on my studies for the repeat exam. I know I've said this before but boy I do need all the luck I can get. 
> 
> Enjoy!

You were just finishing breakfast when he showed up at your door looking all too smug for his own good.

"What did you do?"

He seemed surprised by your question and raised an eyebrow.

"Nothing," he muttered, letting himself in and sitting on your sofa. You followed his steps suspiciously and went to sit beside him.

"What did the minister say?" 

"Nothing different from last night," he picked up the morning paper from the coffee table.

That reminds you... You didn't really catch what went on last night with the whole Sirius incident.

"What exactly happened last night?"

"We—"

"No, not that!" You hissed, smacking his arm as he presented an innocent face. He gave a smug smirk and folded back the paper. 

He recounted his story and you realised why Dumbledore said there were multiple sides. A chunk of Severus's was missing, between the confrontation in the shack and the one outside. 

You gave his head a once over as you recall you didn't notice a concussion of some kind. 

He went on about how Potter, Weasley, and Granger insisted that Sirius was innocent and Pettigrew was alive—

As if on cue, a knock sounded at the door. You looked at it curiously before standing to open it. 

"(f/n)," 

"Headmaster," you greeted with surprise. 

"Will you take a walk with me?" 

"I uh—" 

"I'm sure Severus wouldn't mind me borrowing you for a moment," he looked over your shoulder and you followed his gaze to Severus's head of hair, which was slowly sinking into the sofa. 

"Uh... I'll be back, Severus," you called and stepped out. Surely he knew how it's quite impossible to argue with the headmaster. "What do you need me for, sir?" 

"Just walk with me," he had a suspicious twinkle about his eye. 

A group of second-year Slytherins passed you and that's when you heard it. 

"Do you think Professor Lupin is really a werewolf?"

"Would Professor Snape just lie like that?"

"Actually he would–"

"You saw his face, man. He was dead serious."

_So that's what he had done._

"My parents are going to lose it once they've heard..."

You glanced at Dumbledore and saw that he had a smile under his white beard. 

You didn't know how to feel. Severus was being extreme with his schemes— well, he lost an Order of Merlin— but Remus wasn't exactly innocent. Between tampering with the potion and neglecting it as he let himself be in the presence of children... 

Perhaps Severus saw it was the only way to make the man quit. Still... Remus shouldn't deserve that much...

Dumbledore let your musings distract you as he led you through the castle. 

"Remember when I said there were more sides of the story?" he stopped in front of a door and you realised it was the Defence classroom. 

You sighed. 

Dumbledore had that look about him that nudged you to do as he said. He opened the door for you and led you to the open office door.

"Remus, there's someone here to see you," Dumbledore said as he knocked, "Harry, could you give them a moment?" He beckoned the boy to exit with him and Potter looked at you suspiciously before walking out.

The door closed behind you and you found yourself in a staring match with Remus. 

"Is it true?" you decided to get to the point, "is Sirius—" 

"Why would you believe me?" He said defensively. 

"Because I know Severus," you stated. 

He blinked for a moment and you could see his defences lowering.

"Yes, it's true," he said, "he is innocent." 

"I wouldn't use that word. He certainly has not been acting an innocent man," 

"He certainly is not without his shortcomings." 

How were you going to tell your parents about this— oh wait, you don't have to. Let them find out on their own… whichever side of the story they’d believe.

"And Pettigrew?" 

"Somewhere out there, who knows," he said defeatedly, moving back to packing his things.

"...and what of you?" 

"Dumbledore managed to convince Fudge I was trying to help..." Remus said, "...and I'm sure you know the rest." 

"Were you?" 

"...Not really," he shrugged sheepishly, "I endangered Potter and his friends by neglecting my potion. I could have bitten... A child." 

An awkward silence passed between the two of you. 

You were glad that he finally realised the gravity of his actions... it was a tad too late, however...

"I'm sorry Severus—" 

"No, don't apologise for him, (f/n)," he held up his hands.

"You needn't lose your job over it. A fair warning perhaps—"

"It was coming anyway," he cut in, "after last night, I was... already considering resigning." 

Another awkward silence. This time he rounded his desk and stood in front of you with a smile. 

"Don't be too cross with him... I was quite a bit at fault and I think he wanted that Order of Merlin to mean something..." 

"I know," you smiled sadly. 

"So... are you two..." he tried to hold in a grin, still gauging your reactions. 

You sighed. 

_Well, he was leaving anyway..._

"Yes..." you muttered quietly, not looking at him. 

Remus chuckled, letting his smile spread. You found yourself smiling with him and the animosity seemed to lift.

"I'm glad we met, (f/n)," he offered you his hand. You didn't hesitate to take it in a handshake. 

"I suppose I am too... despite... _everything_ ," you huffed. 

He laughed as he pulled you into a hug and you didn't resist, patting him lightly on the back. 

"Goodbye, (f/n)," 

"Goodbye, Remus," you said, pulling away, "I'd give you the last Wolfsbane we made, but Severus... took his anger on it." 

"Don't worry about it," he patted your shoulder with a smile and went to pack the rest of his things. 

You felt something strange. It made you reflect on the brief friendship and how you probably won’t see him again. 

“You’re welcome to visit me at Mungo’s, Remus,” you said impulsively, trying to sound friendly. 

“Oh, I hope I won’t need to,” Remus joked, giving you a wink. He was clearly glad that you offered. You smiled at him. 

A knock at the door and Dumbledore popped in. “Your carriage is at the gates, Remus,” he said. 

“Thank you, headmaster.”

You took your cue to leave and gave him a last goodbye before exiting. 

.

.

"Are you... upset with me?" Severus said across the table. 

It was your turn to silently leave him squirming in his seat. 

"He told me not to be," you said, not looking up from the book you were reading through lunch.

"Huh?" 

"He supports my affections..." Severus was about to snap his metal fork in half but you continued, "...for you.” You smirked over your drink and flipped a page. It took a second for him to recover his composure and he cleared his throat. 

"Dumbledore wanted me to give you this," he procured a letter seemingly out of nowhere. 

You took it and broke the Hogwarts seal. 

Severus watched you curiously as your expression shifted from confusion to delight. 

"Looks like you'll be seeing more of me next school year, Severus,” you smirked, “I hope you won’t tire of me.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to all my loyal and new commenters alike, a few kind words (they don't even have to be words at all) always brighten up my day. Thank you to everyone who left kudos, who bookmarked, who subscribed to this story all the feedback matters so so much to me. I hope you've enjoyed this part as much as I've enjoyed writing it, if not more.
> 
> I hope to see you all in the next part! 
> 
> fun fact: my original drafted plan for this part was only to have one (1) kiss, but it evolved into this. I wouldn't have it any other way, honestly.


	20. Letter

Dear (f/n) Black, 

 

I request your presence at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry again next year, under the requisition of Headmistress Olympe Maxime and Headmaster Igor Karkaroff of Beauxbatons Academy of Magic and Durmstrang Institute respectively. 

They voiced their concerns of requiring an extra healer on Hogwarts grounds for the upcoming Triwizard Tournament we will be hosting, and I see that you are fit for the job.

I’m sure you won’t find it a bother. Should you agree, I shall arrange everything with the head healer at St Mungo’s once more. 

 

Sincerely,

 

Albus Dumbledore


End file.
